Episode 111: Time to Make the Donuts
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Transcript
Transcript
Time Crisis back once again on this week's Time Crisis
We dig into the mailbag
We talk about the top hits of 1978 and today all that
Plus one more trip to the Butterfinger Fountain. That's right
This is a very special
crispity crunchity peanut buttery edition of
Time Crisis with Ezra King
BBB Peace
One
They passed me by
All of those great romances
Do what I felt were beneath
All my rightful chances
My picture clear
Everything seemed so easy
And so I dealt to the floor
When the bus had to go
Now it's different. I want you to know
Time crisis back again. What's up, jake? Not much. How you doing feeling good? You know one thing I realized
We probably should talk about in the last episode is that we actually went and saw goose
Yep, which because we first heard about goose on the show
Mm-hmm. We probably should at least report on a little bit. Yeah, I thought about that too. I was like, oh we missed the goose recap
Yeah, yeah
so for anybody who uh
Doesn't remember maybe a new listener. This is their first their first episode of time crisis a few episodes back
a friend of the show steven heiden
Rock critic and podcaster his bio on twitter is the wing of american rock critics
Okay. So yeah, so you first and foremost identifies as rock critic. Yeah, the wean of rock critics american rock critics
He had jacob about a new jam band
Called goose and he thought jake might be interested because they're straight out of norwalk, connecticut. Yeah, they have a great name
They're from connecticut and they're jam band. Yeah, and this show is very jam band friendly. We
Well, I think he became hip to this show because of our legendary twiddle episode and then this summer
Vampire weekend's touring with twiddle it all comes full circle. That's crazy
You got to come out for the mountain run man. Would love to so when we went and saw goose
Well, we didn't know this was at the troubadour
In west hollywood what we didn't know is that they were on tour opening for uh pigeons playing ping pong
So you had fans from both acts and probably a lot of shared fans there
But we thought we were just going to see a goose show and we're actually seeing them opening
But I think at this point they're both
Popping jam bands. They probably could have played the show solo either one of them. Oh sure
It was a real flock versus flock
Right situation. We we asked goose about this a little bit
So basically for people who have no idea what we're talking about
Goose is an up-and-coming jam band pigeons playing ping pong a little more established
Pigeons playing ping pong are from uh, I think the baltimore area, maryland
And being that they have pigeons in their name
Their fans are called the flock and I think when they were starting out goose's fans are also called the flock
So it's a bit of a makes a lot of sense. They both make sense. You can't fault either one of them
I mean, I don't think it's a plagiarism situation
But I think there might have been a bit of a standoff
About like who's going to change their fan base name and maybe it was the goose fans stood down relented
You can't have two flocks you could
Yeah, I guess why not? I guess if two flocks join they become one big flock. Yeah
I mean that night at the tribidor felt like one big flock and there weren't
Just rolling up on a random jam band fan in front of the tribidor which flock you with oh me i'm goose
anyway, this is uh
The second jam band show that we've been to together at the tribidor. The other was twiddle
And the first thing you notice when you see a jam band show at the tribidor is you suddenly don't feel like you're in
Southern california anymore infamously hostile jam band territory. You feel like maybe you're in boulder, colorado
eugene, oregon
Burlington vermont ashland, oregon ashland, oregon band oregon
Missoula, montana, norwalk, connecticut. Oh, yeah, new paltz, new york western, mass. Is that a yeah?
It's a little crunchy there. Yeah northampton, mass new hope pennsylvania. Oh, that's wean country
Yep, that's crunchy there ashville, north carolina big time
Anyway, you don't feel like you're in socal because you got this mix of people got the look got the clothes and it's great
It's like you're stepping through a portal to another a slightly crunchier place
There was that one dude in the front who was like posted up right in front of the stage that looked exactly like phil lesh
Oh, yeah, like 30 or 40 years younger. Yeah, we both clocked that
Just a straight up phil like who's that phil doppelganger?
Maybe phil lesh sometimes puts on young person makeup
And just goes to check out some of the younger jam bands. He's got to do three hours of uh,
prosthetic makeup
before he goes
Yeah to the show people always do these I feel like there's always these things where somebody
Like a skinny person like tyra banks. This is an infamous episode of her tv show
She wears a fat suit to feel what it's like to be a larger person
And there's definitely stuff where like a younger person puts on old person's makeup
Either to play pranks on people
Or just experience what it's like to be old. Nobody ever tries the opposite
I guess it'd be a tough one. Basically. It's an irishman. I'm not sure where this goes
But maybe it's like a reality show we get a bunch of old people and then we make them sit for three hours of young
Makeup, and then yeah, they'd just be moving slowly down the sidewalk
So anyway, goose was great live. We had a grand old time watching goose
It was a real like kind of organic feel good kind of laid back
feel because a lot of jam bands can go like
They're a little like hyped up and like souped up. Yeah kind of out of the gate
I thought they were kind of laying back in the cut in a nice way and really preferred their
live sound to the recorded sound which steven had uh,
Well, I think it might be the case
it's often the case with the jam bands and you know, we talked to the goose guys a little bit afterwards and
They're working on material now. So we probably haven't seen their honed studio sound
Yet. Yeah, but yeah, I mean I like the
Out the gate I think was maybe it was the opener was a time to flee
Which is in something maybe their most like dead kind of tune because it has that uh that slipknot type riff
Ups and downs
All I know
This elevator
Rises too slow
Trapped inside
With you
No way out
Deja vu
I don't feel free
It was time to flee
The elevator
I'm not a waiter
So see you later
Alligator
The elevator
I'm not a waiter
So see you later
Alligator
I said this at the show
But there's this moment where goose is going to this extended jam
And it seemed like they were kind of teasing something and I swear
It might have been just a goose mind meld it flickered through my brain
I was kind of like that almost reminds me of billy joel or something about this jam that sounded like billy joel to me
And then the next song they just kick into moving out anthony's song so sick
Which then they jammed out and had this like whole?
And that was like a pretty perfect tri-state area moment because you and goose are from connecticut
I grew up in jersey billy joel king of long island truly a tri-state moment out in weird ass west hollywood, california
Amazing, so it was a great show. We got to meet them chop it up a bit
And you know what caught a little bit of pigeons. They're rocking pretty hard. They did some chili peppers
I guess later period or maybe mid period they seem like more of a funk outfit
Yeah, they might have just been bringing the funk in the like part of the show that we saw right?
But I was like I was pretty down
But anyway all in all a great show shout out to goose close it out at dantana's with some calamari
Yep, some late night calamari saw um the guy from zz top there
Yep, classic dantana situation. It's a real rock and roll night that'd been tight if we're just like sitting there
Midnight at dantana's eating some calamari billy gibbons from zz top walks by just like hey billy. What's up fellas you like goose?
Uh, what's that? What's that man?
Goose, yeah, we're just next door checking him out, man. We got a lot of stuff to cover
Yeah, we do so
This might be a record for time crisis. This is our third episode in a row of talking about something
But uh eric j blessing
Tweeted at us. He thought we should know about this
It's no duncan, but I want to know if jake and ezra would consider trying these confections on the show
I don't see at snickers trying a corporate collaboration
And what he's talking about is butterfinger has teamed up with krispy kreme donuts
This is what the butterfinger tweet says
This is from at butterfinger brace yourself for one-of-a-kind collision of krispity and crunchity goodness. They don't brace yourself
They're not joking krispity and crunchity goodness that only happens when butterfinger and at krispy kreme donuts team up
hashtag krispity
cravings
I guess cravings
No one's craving that
and basically
Krispy kreme is presenting two different types of butterfinger donuts a collision of krispity cravings
And this is also funny considering what we talked about last time
The first reply to this tweet is somebody saying if they're half as awful as your new formula for the butterfingers
I'll pass go back to the old taste brace yourself for a near toxic collision
of krispity
And crunchity so it looks like one of them is like a filled donut and one of them is like a chocolate eclair or something
The funny thing is we have some modello beer here
Which is time crisis classic that could be on the next mountain bruise ep a donuts and beer
Yeah, we're doing donuts and beer. This is disgusting
I ran into a friend of the show nick kerkovich last week
He's like, oh I went for a run the other day throwing the new time crisis and I was like, oh, yeah, he's like
First like 40 minutes was about butterfingers
Then I was like, do you mean that in a good way or a bad way? He's like bad way, dude
Wasn't feeling it was not feeling it because he doesn't like butterfingers. He's not feeling the butterfingers content
Yikes. Yep. Well, here's what some negative feedback from the fan base
Here's what happens when you triple down on something this one's for you nick
When you triple down on something like butterfingers, yeah, you're gonna lose a few people
It's true, but I know that we got some ogbf heads who listen to time crisis and they've just been on cloud nine
Never did I think my favorite show my favorite candy bar
Would collide in quite this way. There's somebody who's just been like waiting
100 episodes deep like these guys never talk about butterfingers. I mean they're talking snickers. They're talking
The pepsi co portfolio. What about butterfinger, man?
Just waiting they're talking mars. All right. Well, here's the thing the butterfinger arc is more or less over
So the haters will be happy and the lovers you get one more thing, which is us eating these donuts. Oh, this is
I was gonna try to break it in half
Yeah, but there's like a disgusting frosting on the top which now I have all over my fingers. Oh, no
We've got the butterfinger original filled donut
It's an original glazed donut filled with peanut butter chocolate cream dipped in butterfinger icing and topped with butterfinger pieces
And a chocolate drizzle
it's always hilarious when you get like write-ups for these kind of like cross-branded food products because they have to put like the uh,
The registered trademark thing next to butterfinger each time the butterfinger are original filled donut and an original glazed art
And then the other one is a fudge cake donut, which features a rich chocolate cake donut dipped in chocolate icing blah blah blah
So, okay. Let's give this a try
I gotta say this is pointless. I mean it's redundant to me
This is without a point. They just taste like regular ass donuts
They hyped up this crispity crunchity collision, you know, eat a butterfinger if you want butterfinger flavor eat a donut if you want donut
This is not particularly interesting. It doesn't really taste and like it just tastes like a donut
I think if they put in more time
They probably could have really crafted a donut that got at the essence of what a butterfinger is all about right?
No, it's just a normal frosted donut with like
Some of that like butter finger interior just crumbled on top of the donut butterfingers have a lot of interiority
I mean, yeah butterfingers actually are kind of a complex flavor and we're losing that. Yeah, it's not bad. It's just nothing special
Butterfingers a special candy
This is not special
Jake, you have any feelings about krispy kreme? Not really. I'm not a donut guy
It would almost be on brand if you were a donut guy, especially at an la where there's still so many of these like yeah
Mom and pop independent. There's a gbv song called donut for a snowman
I think he was writing it as like a fake ad for krispy kreme. Yeah, he mentions. Um, krispy kreme in it
Starts off the day
With the krispy kreme. I also think that the idea of this butterfinger
Donut is redundant or it doesn't make any sense not redundant
But like it doesn't make any sense because the krispy kreme also is a very specific
kind of
Texture and taste itself and by partnering with anybody you're sort of ruining the integrity of what makes a krispy kreme donut sort of special
Hello the integrity
Everything goes right for her when everything goes wrong
She turns around
At the heart of the drop pizza and also I mean from here from where I said, it looks disgusting it is
Looks what she's found
When the gawkers and squawkers exchange their costumes
She loves the good human man
He says they don't call us that she run like fluent through the streets
Interesting song
Donut
Donut for a snowman is it because robert potter's famous for going like a little bit english with his delivery, right? Oh, yeah
Yeah, krispy kreme is a funny one because are you a fan? Not really? I'm duncan
Of course, I guess I understand the krispy kreme on the box. This is the original since 1937
It has this kind of like
Old america feel is it a socal chain or I don't know if it's from 37 probably not right?
I find krispy kreme to be like too rich
Like i'm not a big fan of like super intense like sweets and confections
Krispy kreme is from north carolina, even when i'm like at like a super like bougie fancy bakery
I don't like baked goods really in the morning
Like having a cup of coffee with like a buttery or sweet like sort of like croissant or something
It's just like too much
I need protein. I know what you mean. I mean, of course coffee goes well with
With a donut or a croissant it tastes good and then like 45 minutes later. I just like crash
Yeah, I need some sort of base. Yeah, it's not yet that it wreaks havoc on your body
Yeah, so krispy kreme in 1933
18 year old vernon rudolph along with his brother louis rudolph began working for his uncle
Ishmael armstrong who owned a small general store in paducah, kentucky
That sold a wide variety of goods including its very popular donuts and the store was struggling during the great depression
So then vernon and his uncle moved to nashville, tennessee
And they started focusing solely on their donuts the krispy kreme donut company
So I guess it really started in nashville and then vernon went to winston-salem
To really get things popping the reason he chose winston-salem is he learned that his favorite
Cigarette company camel cigarettes was headquartered there. That's that healthy mid-20th century american lifestyle
I mean, you know, it's like the silicon valley vibe now
Somebody just like google's up in mountain view. Let's go headquarter our startup out there
um
My memory of krispy kreme is that the only donut chain I knew was dunkin donuts in jersey, new york
And then I feel like in the early 2000s or something. Yeah, suddenly there were krispy kremes everywhere
They must have gotten some serious vc money. Yeah to expand like really rapidly
Yeah, I even remember that there at first people
Talked about it. I guess this often happens when like a regional chain goes national if they do it correctly at first people like oh
Krispy kreme. That's amazing. That's here now, dude. That's here now, dude. So much better than duncan
There's also this thing about krispy kremes where they light up the logo or something when the donuts are fresh
Are you familiar with this? No, I think it's like, you know, they have their logo up on a pole
Like so you're driving on the highway and like there's some sort of like bat signal thing. That's like fresh batch out
That's such bs
I mean, it might be true, but aren't they constantly making the donuts?
I don't know now was that duncan that had that ad campaign with the guy getting up at like
Two in the morning the like short bald guy with a mustache. Of course, you remember the famous couch race
What was it again? I don't time to make the donut time to make the donuts
Kind of a depressing ad in retrospect. I mean some guy
getting up probably making
minimum wage
Maybe a little bit more because he's the opening shift and like
Getting up in the dead of night going into the duncan to make the donuts
That's one of those like ad campaigns that people like slightly older people like still quote. Oh, he was fred the baker. Let's listen
time to make the donuts
The donut it isn't easy owning a duncan don't make the dough because unlike most supermarkets
We make our donuts fresh day and night the guys who make supermarket donuts are still in bed
Plain donuts aren't enough
five
Of course interesting. It's like supposed to be depressing. I didn't quite remember that
This is the original ad from 1981. So this guy fred the baker
You know, he's like a real east coast guy very regional accent very regional accent
I mean kind of a call back to the car ad
Yeah, this is before smart pack
So fred is this kind of uh, maybe we can find some info on fred the baker
But the way he looks he's a kind of short bald. He's got a danny devito vibe
He was portrayed by the actor michael vail and michael vail grew up in uh, brooklyn born in 1922
And he was a uh, okay. So he was about 60 doing those ads
So he was just like a real new york character actor kind of vibe
Oh, and he also played sam breakstone for craft foods breakstone line of cottage cheese and sour cream products
Okay, so he was like a big commercial actor, but I guess he's an he's an archetypal
New york guy and this is this funny thing about dunkin donuts
People who were harshed out by us going too long on the butterfinger last episode are gonna be very happy
They're doing so much donut talk this one's for you nick
Thank you
Enough with the butterfingers. Let's get into some donut. We're pivoting. So we talk about duncan a lot on this show
I understand that it's a massachusetts based company and it's like so bostony
Yeah, you know to the point that snl did right a sketch about it with casey affleck
Where he's like this kind of like stereotype of like a masshole
getting in fights and the whole joke was like
Yeah going to dunk is the best part of my day
Kind of vibe. But anyway, obviously like boston and new york two sides of the same coin
And you know, it's not like there's a new york regional donut chain like, you know, it's big in new york
But I did notice that when eli manning retired because you know, i'm a big sports fan
I know a lot about sports
He was the quarterback for the giants and I think he played his last game this past season, right?
Getting some nods from the sports nuts in the room
So, you know, that's a really big deal and in the new york area
He appeared in a lot of uh, dunkin donuts commercials just regional ads. Well, not national campaigns. I don't know if you can put a uh,
A duncan ad with a new york giant on the air in the boston area. I don't think you can
Yeah, it's a metro new york. That's sick. But think about this the metro new york area is bigger than belgium. That's a country
Sure, it's bigger than australia. It's about the same number of people as australia. Maybe more wow
Yeah, I mean is there a national chain?
that has uh maintained its regional identity as strongly as duncan, I don't think so
Like we all know starbucks is from seattle, but seattle's not really a part of their identity anymore
You know, we know the mcdonald's is from
Southern california, I guess like popeyes still makes a big thing about being like southern like louisiana
Yeah, louis popeyes is a louisiana kitchen
I feel like that's more of like corporate kind of like pr
Right. I feel like duncan truly is like but duncan is truly east coast
but anyway
I was interested because people from massachusetts are like duncan's ours and then i'm kind of like I know it is but it's also
So just east coast
and so I was curious when I realized it was eli's last day and and of course there's an
Outpouring of admiration and grief from a lot of people in the new york area
The first thing that crossed my mind is that I wonder if duncan tweeted about this
Because on the one hand they have this long history with this guy doing commercials
But on the other hand, they're so associated with massachusetts
And I looked in at duncan the official at duncan donuts
Twitter account didn't do it and I tweeted at them. Why don't you guys?
Congratulate eli on his career or whatever and they didn't write back
corporate
cowards
Dubai
Through my fever dream houston just did 99. Dubai's 118
Houston
She always thinks I cheat I think about those ten days when life is light and sweet
Anyway, so fred the baker it was funny listening back to that because
The whole point is that he's like a guy who owns a duncan donuts. So he's like a small-time entrepreneur
Oh, so he's not an employee. He's like a franchisee. I think that's how they started like when you own a duncan donuts
Let's listen to the beginning again
So just to paint a picture for everybody fred
His wife is sound asleep. His alarm clock is in the foreground. It rings. He opens his eyes in his bed and he looks pissed
Is it at the time on it? This is very low quality on youtube, but it looks like it's about 3 30 a.m
Okay, just the dead of night
It isn't easy owning a duncan donuts, I guess this is like reagan era
Realistically fred was sleeping in it's his hard-working employees are probably who knows the owner might be down there
But I would say back in the 70s and 80s
I bet a lot more duncans were owned by the actual franchisees
Now it's franchise corporations will own
30 or 40 locations right and hire the general manager to run
each location
And also it's not individual franchisees and the wealth gap has grown so much the idea that the boss
Is in the mix maybe in 1981. It was a little different. Sure. So fred is basically sleepwalking now
Time to make the donuts. It's funny if you I haven't seen this in
Maybe since the 90s if you ask me what the story was with fred the baker for whatever reason my maybe my child brain
Didn't recognize what the commercial was really about. I would have been like, oh, yeah fred the baker
He's like a key blu-ray elf or something
No, and actually the first thing that I could think of time to make the donuts is in the beginning of um
What's the movie with uh, where owen wilson plays kind of a drifter who takes a bunch of kids under his wing?
Hmm, it's not one of his more popular films, but i've seen almost all of his movies
Oh drill bit taylor you ever see drill bit taylor never heard of it. He basically plays a weird drifter
Who takes a bunch of kids under his wing and encourages them to like stand up to bullies and stuff?
It's a comedy but I remember the when his character is introduced. He's uh
Living in a tent like by the highway and he kind of wakes up comes out of his tent goes time to make the donuts
And he's kind of like, you know almost as if it was like something to be excited about. So anyway
If you asked me I would have said that time to make the donuts is about like
Greeting the morning in a positive way time to make the donut and I feel like that's kind of what it became
I think it became a rise and shine. I think it became a bit of a rise and shine situation
like
like I feel like there are probably a lot of
Workplaces where somebody would come in and be like, all right fellas time to make the donuts. Let's get to work, right?
But then you watch the original commercial and fred the baker. He's so tired. He hates it grueling
Maybe he had his own donut shop in brooklyn back in the 60s and 70s
And then you know
Suffocating economic conditions went for the safety of the franchise brand times got tough
And yeah, he was watching all his friends in the old neighborhood get squeezed and he said, you know what? You can't fight progress
I'm gonna open up a duncan. It's a brand people know
I had two different friends
dads who ran
baskin robbins
franchises
One when I was like in middle school and then one in a friend of mine in college his dad had a baskin
And it seemed tough because you're hiring like high school kids to scoop ice cream
And of course their friends are coming in. Uh-huh, and they're hooking their friends up
And I remember my friend dave always telling me that his dad's mantra was portion control
Portion control I bet a lot of uh children of dunk of a baskin robbins franchisees are probably like libertarians now, right?
What was your friend's name?
Which one one of the baskin robbins? Yeah. Yeah, dave. You just hit him up like it was up dave. You're gonna vote for bernie
Jake, here's why democratic socialism can't work. Let me tell you a little story
My dad used to own baskin robbins. Yeah, I know it sounds good in theory, man
But people can't help themselves his employees were giving out literal handouts
It doesn't work. I mean literally the economics don't support it
So fred the baker, I just want to get to the rest of the commercial. He's walking in a daze
He's so tired 3 30 a.m. The wife is still sleeping. He puts on his uniform
Fresh day and the guys who make supermarket donuts are still in bed
I bet the guys that are making supermarket donuts are still in bed
It's like costanza's
Parents. Yeah, because he's his mom, right?
George george
It's interesting that drawing this distinction between dunkin donuts and like supermarket donuts. I guess they had to
It's like are we really kind of splitting hairs there? Yeah, you are supermarket donuts then it cuts to him
He's there with his employees. They're all wearing little paper hats. They all look pretty tired
Five times of course and then he slaps one of the guys in the face
Which is strange?
There is one
They taste so great. Good morning, folks people buy an awful lot of this is actually a really harsh commercial
He's basically pissed off through 99% of the commercial and then they go like but there's one good part and he turns around and sees
The store loaded with people and then he finally he cracks a smile and then the narrator goes that one good thing about it
People buy an awful lot about of them. It's interesting. This is 1981 beginning of the reagan years just like basically being like
Yeah, life is harsh. You wake up in the middle of the night. It's like but you know what your reward is cold hard cash
Selling a dozen donuts for 4.99
It's
Wikipedia page it says fred was so popular with consumers that when dunka donuts decided to retire the character
The chain surveyed customers to determine the reaction to the move
Customers said fred could leave if he were treated like an honored friend and employee
So the company created an official retirement campaign for him
Including a celebration in the city of boston and a free donut day that served over 6 million customers on september 22nd 1997
hell of a run
16 year run time to make the donuts. Here's another one from 86. Let's see what's going on here
You know what he's happier in this one maybe he eventually got happy
Either upper management or the advertising firm was like
You know what looking back at the original campaign from 81 that was
gritty
Right that was too real right
It was 1981, but we were still in the 70s
It was like a 70s corsese
They're like now it's 86 like come on feel good. This is the john hughes era. Let's let's brighten it up a little bit
It's also weird is that even though his catchphrase is time to make the donuts in these commercials
The tagline that they actually like show on screen at the end of the commercial is dunkin donuts. It's worth the trip
So maybe at this point that's the fixation with supermarket donuts
Maybe in the 80s duncan was like people are going to the supermarket buying all their groceries and they're buying their donuts there
We need to remind people
That it's worth coming in for our donuts worth the extra stop fred was very popular
There's a commercial where he's hawking a dunkin donuts cereal
Time to make the idea of donuts as a grocery item
You're at the grocery store
shopping for your family
Because I guess people would buy like those like intimate like, you know, like a box of powdered donuts. Oh, yeah
You definitely buy edmunds
Fred looks like ron jeremy
Oh, dude, you're right. I think he's ron jeremy's also like a new york guy. He's just a little more clean-cut
Yeah, he's a more clean-cut ron jeremy be funny if they knew each other they were like cousins
Yeah, maybe they're from the same neighborhood as like bernie sanders and larry david
fred the baker ron jeremy
barbara streisand
Just brooklyn legends. I knew fred back in the day. Sure dude, like like a bernie knew fred. Yeah
Anyway, I feel like there's a thing with krispy kreme that they would put out a bat signal when when there was really fresh donuts
So that's my first memory is being you know, again growing I grew up with dunkin, but then
Maybe being college age. Yeah and being somewhere and somebody being like driving on the highway
Maybe like going upstate or something and somebody being like yo, they got fresh. She's at krispy kreme. Let's go man. So i'm pal
What's up, will clinton was a big proponent of the krispy kreme back in the day, right? Oh, really?
Yeah, that's what that's in the 90s. Yeah, that's how I first heard about it. Okay
I think bill was really into fast food. He's a southerner really into mickey d's. Uh-huh
I guess that's something that
That clinton and trump have in common is they're both in the mickey d's
There's a video of him touring the krispy kreme factory here. It looks like he's having the time of his life clinton
Yeah, what year?
96. Oh, so he's president. Yeah
Height of clinton just that our taxpayer dollars at work. Yeah
I mean presidents are always just like touring factories for like whatever reason you could imagine them be like, you know, sir
We you think that'd be a good
visual get the american people see you just like on the floor of a factory and just like
They're like we're thinking this like steel plant in pennsylvania's like how about krispy kreme? Come on, man
What would be a good factory to tour if you were president, yeah, I mean I guess the tough part is there's you know
So much american industry's moved to other countries. I was thinking like fender, but no there. I don't think there is a fender
Oh, maybe there is I think there's still a small shop
Strats. Yeah, right the wiffle ball factory in shelton, connecticut
Is that I would tour there i've never been there. Yeah, we're driving past it all the time as a kid
It was like a small cinder block building with a giant
Illuminated wiffle ball on the top. Oh, that's cool. He just said wiffle wiffle ball is a brand name, right?
Oh, yeah, like that classic yellow bat with the white wiffle ball. Yep. Not just anybody can make that
No, that is a brand from connecticut shelton, connecticut. I gotta say things are kind of looking up for connecticut
That's true when we're keeping score on the tri-state
Wiffle ball does not get thrown in the mix and it should goose and wiffle ball man. Nothing to sneeze at solid foundation
I was born in 63
Got a little job in the factory. I don't know much about kennedy. I was too busy working in the factory
We got a kid dance too we got another one to do we get by the best we can do
Factory's got a good medical plan
Because i'm a union man
You're listening to
Time crisis on beat one. It is funny to think too that there there used to be a type of ad
Especially like regional ads. Do you know this one? I can't remember. I only remember the vague
Uh details of it because it's an la ad so I was only hip to it when I came out here
And the la ogs would tell me about it. It's got a bit of that like, you know, crazy eddie
Energy. Oh, yeah, that's the funny thing when trump calls bernie crazy bernie
That just sounds like a guy selling electronics in new york. Totally. Well, mr. Trump. I may be crazy, but I got deals that you can't beat
The debate
crazy, oh god
Crazy bernie. Anyway, so this has a little bit of that just like wild man, you know crazy
Energy, but this is out here in la and it's also like two guys with accents and I think they're brothers
and um
This might be hard to search la people will know immediately what i'm talking about
But basically it's two brothers and one of the brothers is always
Whatever they sell electronics furnitures cars, whatever one of the brothers is always giving the public amazing deals
and the other brothers
Is kind of like the accountant type?
So he's I think his catchphrase is so one brother's like this president's day i'm going all out i'm going 50 off sofas
I'm going 25 and then the other brother goes you're killing me larry
He's is it it's you're killing me larry, right? Who are these guys?
Sit and sleep. Yeah, this is total like socal but I feel like
The millennial vibe of like selling products is way more of a creepy utopian vibe
Like I don't think any like kind of startup will ever just like show the warts
And everything has to be kind of like perfect and like a smile on your face
Like imagine if like it would actually humanize him a lot if like zuckerberg or something had some foil where marsh is like
Hey guys, i'm mark zuckerberg and i'm gonna continue giving you this free product facebook as long as you continue to let me harvest your data
But I will never charge you for the goods and services that we provide and then his buddy's like you're killing me mark
Come on, we should be charging these people 9.99. He'd be like, uh, calm down fred
You know like there's something about fred the baker you're killing me larry like and like
I must be crazy to give you guys these deals. What the fuck is wrong where
It's more depressing, but it's weirdly also like more human. Oh for sure where the person is like
Listen being a business owner is kind of like harsh and stressful. Yeah, and also there's something about it too
Very tight margins. You're not they're not trying to hide the fact that
Running a business means like not getting a lot of sleep waking up early and stressing about money
Yeah, like that's something that like the average joke could relate to more versus today. Everything is like hey, we're really smart
Your life is chaos
What we provide
Is ordered beauty?
We understand, you know, like that's the vibe of most kind of like millennial advertising
And maybe because back in the day people actually owned businesses
Whereas now like so many things just like giant companies. Yeah, that's the thing. Nobody's gonna buy a billionaire
Sitting there just being like i'm pulling my hair. I'm figuring out how to you know, right?
But you know when it's like even a guy who owns 40 mattress shops. Yeah, the guys that own sit and sleep are
Loaded they got a couple hundred mil in the bank. Yeah, but even then they're still like it's also sweating the details
Even guys with a couple hundred million are not as harsh as like, you know people with 60 billion dollars
Oh, no, if all that bernie had to deal with were the sit and sleep guys, we'd have an equitable society overnight
I sat down with larry
Listen, larry's got problems
I missed that energy. Yeah, I think it's just because the way our economy works has changed so much that nobody buys that character anymore
No more fred the baker
No more, you're killing me larry. I'm also not plugged into advertising on local tv at all
Yeah, I bet you still have some of these like holdovers from that era. Oh, i'm sure
If I watched like the morning
like ktla
right morning show
While making breakfast and like they were like at like local like orange county car dealership ads. I'm sure there'd be
Right that kind of stuff. You're killing me larry
Now speaking of east coast energy
We scored a really hot interview
Oh, i'm psyched for this. We've been scoring a lot of hot guests lately. We're gonna talk to the two people
Pearl gable and megan coin you might not know their names yet, but you've probably seen their work on twitter
We've been talking about it. These are two of the people behind the at nj gov twitter account, which has been blowing up
Tri-state area is really killing it. You got goose on the jam band scene
You got at nj gov on the state the official state twitter accounts all tri-state
Anyway, let's talk to them
Now let's go to the time crisis hotline
All right
Hey pearl and megan
Yes. Hello
Hey, what's up guys? Welcome to time crisis. Hey, thanks so much for having us. Yeah. Thank you
We're thrilled to have you I gotta ask just out of pure ego
Is this the first internet radio show you guys have done press for the first and only oh amazing
We really got a scoop here forget about that new york times story. This is it. This is nice right now
Okay. So first of all, what is your guys job? How do you describe it?
So within the governor's office in new jersey
There's a communications team and that's like the press team speech writers in that there's the digital team and that's kind of
Does everything from social media to overseeing the website working with all the agencies?
multimedia like photography videos
so all that stuff so i'm the digital director and
Came in when governor murphy came into new jersey and megan. I think you can do one take over. Yeah
um
So kind of what pearl said so mostly we we do social and and the website I specifically just do
Writing social media content for the governor's social media accounts and for njgov and then pearl does
Um, she pretty much does everything else. She does videos. She's a photographer
And then she also does the writing too and then we have a third member
Which is edwin torres who's really the governor's photographer?
Okay, this is interesting because I think me and like a lot of people, uh, no disrespect to governor murphy
But when we hear at njgov, we're so used to seeing like websites that are dot gov
I think most people think of it as just like this is the twitter account of the state of new jersey
Which in a way it is but the correct way to describe at njgov
Is this the official twitter account of the new jersey governor's office as the governor's office?
We can run the state of new jersey twitter
I see does that make sense? Yeah, I see. Yeah, and also maybe it's worth pointing out that governor murphy is is a democrat. Yeah
So, you know if he loses in the next election to a republican
Are you guys out of a job?
Not only are we out of a job, but we're handing over the keys to all of those accounts to whoever's coming into office
Okay, so that's pretty harsh. So you guys have I mean how many followers have you added to this account over the past few months?
So the account actually didn't exist before governor murphy was the governor
So pearl spearheaded this effort when the governor became governor pearl went in as his digital director and she's
So uh, like spearheaded the account it was her brainchild
And then really in the last few months was when we started to
I guess kind of break the internet and in one weekend we gained 50 000 followers and that was the weekend that we tweeted your mom
Um, your mom was a big one asking
To respond to someone asking who let us have a twitter account and then that got us to about like
70 000 and now we're at 200 000. You guys went from zero to 200 000
Well, I mean, yes, I mean since starting it
I would say really like since we megan and I started talking about let's make this thing more human
Let's make this thing more jersey. Let's give personality to it. That was around 16 000
We were at so when we started giving that personality, I think that was like november from november until now
Yeah about a little under 200 000 strong. That's strong
That's really strong growth and I don't think you should have to strong for a little state like new jersey
Little state with big attitudes. So you guys referenced it, but I just want people who don't know
We've referenced it on the show as well
But new jersey gov really went to the next level your guys first crazy viral tweet was like you said somebody tweeted at you
Who gave new jersey a twitter account and you wrote your mom?
I was talking about this with my cousin cousin asher that tc heads know
Well, I also grew up in jersey and we were talking about the fact that there's so many states that have like attitude
But we're just talking about we're like no state
And your mom is not like a new jersey catchphrase or anything
People say your mom like jake growing up did people say your mom in connecticut totally
But we were talking about the fact that even though your mom is not explicitly new jersey
And people say that everywhere and there's attitude everywhere
No other state could say your mom to a person and it would feel so right, you know
All right, the closest we could come up with was florida and we were like no florida would be like way darker way darker
And then you know new york. Yeah, new york doesn't quite seem right either only jersey, right?
So, uh, can you walk us through that moment in history that tweet in particular?
What's going on? Who was manning the decks?
We were at our desks at work and we had adjoining cubicles here in the governor's office
It's a very officey environment, you know fluorescent lighting on that whole and where is it? It's in trenton
Yeah, we're in trenton, new jersey because people from new jersey because also the governor lives in a gorgeous mansion called drum thwack
for people
So that's where the governor lives the governor lives in a gorgeous mansion called drum thwackett
But you guys don't work at drum thwackett you work in some kind of harsh
Harsh cubicle in trenton. Yeah, okay
Yeah, we got a heart we got some harsh cubicles in trenton
We both happened to be on the twitter account at the same time kind of monitoring it and we both saw
Someone tag us in that tweet at the same second and I said to pearl something like oh my god
Did you see what that guy said? Like, you know, what's his deal?
That's so rude and pearl was like, I know I kind of just want to respond to your mom
And i've always thought that your mom is like the funniest comeback
So I started hysterically laughing so that we kind of knew that it was like a gold response
And then pearl was like it maybe it's too mean like what if something happened to this guy's mom?
Oh, yeah, that's thoughtful. It was very natural as and I say like as a jersey girl growing up in central jersey
That was the automatic reaction and then kind of working in this political environment
It was like pull back for a second and be like, is that too mean megan was just like no, it's a figure speech
And that was it and then I was like, oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean when you think about it
You definitely would feel bad
If the guy wrote back and said hey, my mom's not alive. In fact, she was murdered by a jersey guy
And this is that's what I imagine. Yeah, that's that would be really harsh. My mom was murdered
But at the same time
This guy's out there talking to random twitter account. So he's probably not in the depths of grief
Right. That's exactly right
So yeah, I mean so like 30 seconds later
We dropped it the reason for the hesitation a lot was that we had never done that was like the first one
That was like that caliber but so so like you thought about when you asked yourself is this too mean?
Clearly you have latitude, but did you think?
about
You know jumping on a horse and riding it to drum thwack it to ask permission from the governor
Oh, yeah, I mean the phrase really that I like to use we both use this at this time
Is that kind of when building this idea we thought maybe it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission, right?
I don't think we would have gotten an a-okay if we ran it through all the approvals
That we would run through like the governor's
Language through right? You know what I mean?
But like after we did it and you saw that it took off and you saw
What could happen then people understood right risky move?
It was a risky move like we were like there's been a bunch we've put out and megan will just be like
All right. It was nice knowing you like, you know, it's been great working together
This is the last time I see you. We've pretty much prepared ourselves to get fired. So yeah, we're ready. Okay
Wow, wow. All right good for you true bravery when I in the movie version to governor murphy would be like
Like they tweeted what?
Pearl and megan in my office get your asses over to drum thwack it right now
And then on the way there is like it's like going viral. Yeah, this is the governor's going viral
What do you mean how many retweets like sir? We just crossed 80 000 retweets and by the time you get there. He's just like
Ladies, I am so proud of you
You're promoted. You got the champagne. Yeah
I would also make the case to him. I'm sure somebody has where it's like, you know what governor murphy
We got a guy in the white house who pulls no punches
The discourse has been coarsened beyond belief
and by the way
That mean-spirited trash talking man in the white house. He made your predecessor look pretty bad
He really took new jersey down a few notches. So people don't remember chris christie was our previous governor and trump
Just was brutally mean to him and the next thing you know, he's appearing behind him
So anyway, I think it's about time now. We got a democrat down at drum thwack it
Once again, maybe there's worse things than a tough talking new jersey twitter account, you know what i'm saying?
I think actually it's uh, it's a kind of redemption arc for the state in a way
Interesting side note actually chris christie took his account with him when he left which is kind of unheard of
Like he took the governor's wow. So that's why you guys are starting it
Is because old chris christie just bounced right? We started gov murphy at
Did gov murphy accounts at zero and then started nj gov?
It just had never existed before as far as trump being like part of this conversation
I mean i'm a progressive administration. I am a progressive but I admire
trump thing I admire his glitter and
It's because it's like just this no-holds-barred
You know people are related to him because he's able to break through some sort of clutter for better or worse
No, no, I absolutely know what you mean. And it's I think it's sometimes it's scary for people who have the opposite
Values as trump. Sometimes you don't want to admit
Why something works?
And there is something to be said especially for you know for you who's working explicitly in communications
However, you want to describe it but for you to see what works about his communication technique
There's something smart about that because I think a lot of people
A lot of liberals they just want to be like, oh trump's a moron blah blah and they focus on
things that are true the really negative things and the thing that they're missing out on is like
But he has this way with words that some people kind of fall for or even I hate to say it are charmed by
when you disagree so fervently with his
Political beliefs like most people that I know do the idea that you could say but let's talk about his charm
That just seems so wrong, right?
But when you're somebody who has like, you know on the one hand a fun job
but the idea of communicating on behalf of a politician is a serious job too that if you can't at least step into that world and
look through the glasses of a
Somebody who's charmed by him. Yeah, you're missing out on some like kind of basic like some communications 101 type stuff. There's lessons to be learned
Dizzy with eternity
A peaceful place where so it loves from space a closer look reveals the human race
There's a fear that
Forgot
Has got a name just
I want to get a uh, just a little more info about you guys. So you're are you both new jersey natives?
Yes, we are. Where are you guys from? So i'm from little silver, which is in mammoth county. It's right next to red bag
Okay, monmouth county that's kind of bruce country, right it's bruce territory. Yes, definitely bruce territory. We got danny devito from down there
Wendy williams we got a bunch of rock stars. I didn't know she was a jersey girl neptune
Hi neptune down the shore. That's right. And megan you're from i'm from livingston, which is in asex county
Oh, yeah, that's my backyard because I grew up in glen ridge
Livingston, yeah, whatever guys where that so yeah, is it whatever livingston has a famous mall
It's called the livingston mall
Yeah
Now jake my co-host he's from connecticut, that's right
And i'm curious so you guys clearly spent a lot of time thinking about what it means to embody the voice of new jersey
And i'm sure you haven't put as much time into thinking about connecticut
But you know, it's part of the tri-state area what comes to mind when we talk about connecticut?
You'd be surprised we have some beef with connecticut
I know if you noticed a couple weeks ago
But we got into it a little bit with your governor medlamont. I missed this over pizza
Okay, so new haven was claiming they have the best pizza
We claimed that new jersey has is the pizza capital of the world and then the governor
Of connecticut responded that you know, new haven has the best pizza
So then we responded to him from the governor murphy's account kind of laid down the law and we just said
We told him to stay in his lane. This was even worse. I want to read. Can I read medlamont's tweet?
He put this out there
So when we declared ourselves the pizza capital of the world, which obviously was a big weekend for us
um
It's kind of true we have we have some proof to back it up but
Uh, the governor of connecticut tweets relax, new jersey
I will proudly proclaim crimped hair day wearing socks of sandals day and don't pump your own gas day in your honor
But connecticut is clearly the pizza capital of the world. Well, he went hard now
Was that from his personal account or the ct? This is from his government account
You see how much is in there? They're called crimped hair day wearing socks
Yeah overwritten and also all over the place because the crimped hair you're picturing some sort of like 80s jersey girl
Right. Yeah, you're picturing some kind of like bad taste like like bon jovi. Yeah
Or like like actually all that stuff is back in now. It's been cyclical. Well, yeah, that stuff is cool. Yeah, he's picturing like, um
Adriana from the sopranos. He's picturing like
Like a mafia guy's girlfriend with a crimped hair
So first of all a little I don't I don't appreciate the the anti-italian american
Ascendant of that and and there's a lot of great italian americans from connecticut
So I don't like that one and then socks and sandals. Well, I love socks and sandals, but socks and sandals doesn't connote jersey
Socks and sandals connotes crunchy
Crunchy people and you know, you're gonna find socks and sandals in jersey, connecticut upstate new york vermont
I mean vermont that's a socks and sandals state. Come on
And what was the last thing he said?
Oh pumping your own gas. Well, that's yeah, that is a funny thing about new jersey's that
Is that you can't pump your own gas?
But that's just that's charming. That's a cute quirk
Yeah, I thought so obviously connecticut doesn't have good a good writer's room over there
They were trying too hard way too hard at that moment. That was february 7th
They were down in washington at a governor's conference
In fact, the two governors one the one from connecticut and our governor were sitting next to each other at that time
Oh, man, awkward tensions were running
Tensions were so high
So yeah, that's our connecticut thing. Yeah
Fair, I mean look, I don't really know the backstory on why new haven claims this like supremacy when it comes to pizza
Pepe's is good. Yeah, pepe's is good. There's a lot of good pizza everywhere
I would think new york city would be the pizza capital of the world personally. I would
Cut out ct and nj I go new york on that
Of the world. I love that. I love that. Italy's not even in the conversation
Oh
The idea is that we have so many italian immigrants which by the way
New jersey has the like the most and they perfected it so they brought it they brought over their idea
And then perfected it when I said world north america kind of like the world series
right
Look there's good pizza anywhere that they're they're like significant numbers of italian immigrants. It's different regionally
Chicago has a lot of italian people and there's chicago style pizza. It's just different
But as far as the tri-state goes, you know, i'm not mad at saying new jersey's got the best
I think that's pushing it. Okay, no matter what it's not connecticut. We can all agree on that
Well, I mean you got three jersey people right here and I think maybe we're all gonna vote for new jersey
Yeah, maybe it's not a fair fight
Now, do you know if uh, ned lamont has two people that are running the connecticut twitter account?
No clue. We have no idea. We know who runs the delaware twitter account, but that's pretty much it
Oh, man, what's going on? Yeah, we're kind of like a twitter account
You know, we historically we don't get along that well with delaware
Yeah, we're looking through the the delaware.gov
They're just like retweeting the delaware small business
Association. Yeah, I mean listen, it's a snooze. I mean like it's fine
Like that's that's like function that's functional like that. I think that's fine. There's nothing wrong with that stuff
I don't think everybody can do this. Oh, wait, we think maybe it's unique
What'd you find we found? Okay, so you guys treated a delaware shout out to delaware hashtag. Love your pet day
Yeah, that's pretty harsh. They just wrote not hearing that at njgov noise during kindness week
And then they had a gif of steven colbert plugging his ears and going
No, they did not sad. Yeah, it's just sad
So I guess the last question that I have and the reason that we've i've been very pro at njgov on this show is because
On time credits. We've had a very mixed feelings about corporate food twitters
And well, you know, we'll admit that some have made history, but there's something so harsh about like stacom's
Trying to get philosophical and just get down with the kids and we were kind of happy to see that these powers used for good
You know, like you guys are state employees. You're not selling anything
I'd rather see that kind of create a personality for the njgov rep more than I want to see it created for brands
But at the same time
The brands maybe paved the way for you guys a little bit. Are you students of brand twitter?
So I have a journalism background like photojournalism
Video documentary stuff like that. I don't have like this pr
Background where i've been studying this stuff
So really this is coming from a pretty raw place and we felt we felt a lot of this was like like new stuff
For us, I mean and especially for a state, but as we've been doing this
You know i've been able to see a lot of uh, a lot of these brands and admire them. Well, it's like trump
You don't admire the yes the uh, the content of the message, but you do admire the technique
Right, totally and pennsylvania treasury was actually one of our first like loves. Oh, yeah, because the pennsylvania treasury
That's the real twitter account of the pennsylvania treasury somebody over there gave them the go-ahead to like get political
I feel like the pennsylvania treasury just like is just tweeting like wild left-wing just like wood blank fine should be in prison
Abolish the cia
Really
Like that was our first
And since then, you know, there are other governments and yeah, we are government work. You're right. We're not selling anything
Actually, we try to make this as non-partisan as possible aside from talking about the policies and like the news. Well, I was gonna ask
Like have you gotten any directives from your bosses to not get too?
Sort of political in a in a blue or you know, like democrat or republican sense
No, I mean they've really they've stepped back on this one
You know what? I mean? Yeah, which as they should because I think these days the american people are familiar with how this stuff works
Yeah, you know if you guys maybe one day cross the line a little bit too much governor murphy can say listen pro and megan
They run the account
They they're the people behind your mom this time. They went one step further than uh, I would have liked to
But you know, we talked about it
and it is what it is and nobody's gonna be like
Well that reflects. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. I don't think you guys are gonna go far
That's why we got our cardboard box. We got the cardboard boxes under our desk ready to pack up and ship out
As you guys create this kind of new job that didn't really exist which is kind of like being the fun
Social media managers for a state government. I wonder if it's eventually going to become like the binary thing that exists
like when you're a lawyer you're like the really
Talented guy who's like slugging it out in the da's office
You see the guy who you went to law school with he's just like man when you can come over to corporate dude
He's like i'm putting i'm putting guys like you in prison and it's like yeah and going back to your apartment
Come on, man
I pulled down five mil last year and I wonder who's gonna be playing we're like we're like one day
Somebody comes knocking and it's just like I finally got the call from wendy's
And you're just gonna be like come on way to get into it for that
Are you asking about our sellout timeline? Like when are we planning?
Yeah, I mean I don't wanna I don't want to poison the well, but I just think you got you know
Just have a game plan because I think it could happen
One day big business comes calling if I could keep doing good
If I could keep like just working like for the people
I mean
This is a small part of what we do and like a lot of it is like
Getting to meet with real people who are going through real issues and actually helping to make policies that are gonna
Change their lives, you know, right? So you're not sitting on twitter wage
No, this is yeah, this is a very small percent like but it's like our passion project. So like I mean, we're weekends
you know evenings like we're megan and I are texting each other like
Soft about this but but uh, but yeah, I mean like we're actually able to like to do good and watch
Change happen that affects real people like you can't do that from like
you know selling beef jerky, I mean no offense to
Beef jerky, but that's true until slim jim comes right right in you. Yeah
Sliding that piece of paper across the table at the diner. Take a look at the number
Think about it, right? We gotta think we gotta think about what our number is
That slim jim number well, thanks so much pro and megan for calling in I hope you'll call in again because
We barely scratched the surface here. I also just want to know what else what's going on in new jersey
Right, but uh, we'll have to save that one for next time. Um, but thank you so much. Yeah, we will
You know what? We're gonna keep keeping it real over here. So just just stay tuned watch out for new jersey
Yeah, everybody. I don't care if you're from new jersey, connecticut
new york
Even delaware follow at nj gov. All right. Thanks so much guys. Okay. Bye
Bye
And running with the dime in my hand
To the bus stop to pick up a paper from my old man
Said on his lap that big old beautiful steer as we drove through town
Tied from my hair
Say something
Good look around. This is your hometown
This is your
Your hometown
This is your hometown
All right, so we've been getting some good emails lately this is a real epic one
It's from parker bell and the subject is we met jerry greenfield and got the inside scoop
Dead vw and the two fridge vibe now off the top of your head. Jake. Do you know who jerry greenfield is?
When I saw that subject header, I did not know. Yeah, jerry greenfield sounds like a 60s or 70s musician
Yeah, like a folk musician. Yeah. Oh jerry greenfield. Yeah, man. He played he played mandolin on a solo bob weir album. Yeah
Made his debut at the newport folk festival back in 62. Yeah, jerry greenfield. He was briefly in jefferson airplane
But uh, jerry greenfield is actually the jerry of ben and jerry's so this is a long email
I'm going to try not to do too much editorializing. It's going to be tough for us
It's tough for us. Generally when we go through an email for every one line of the email we talk for about 10 minutes
Yep, so this would literally be 10 hours. Okay, let's go to the time crisis mailbag
Dear jake ezra and the rest of the crisis crew
We come bearing gifts
Gifts in the form of essential information that is of dire importance to the tcu
We are grace and parker two friends and tc heads going to school in boston and who are originally from chicago
This weekend we had the honor and privilege of meeting jerry greenfield co-founder of ben and jerry's at ben and jerry's faneuil hall location
In boston jerry was in town promoting bernie and decided to stop by the store to meet guests takes pictures
And pass out samples after throwing back some lagunitas and nachos at a cheers
1982 themed bar in the area very cool. I think it was the cheers bar probably because that's in that part of boston
You know at least the outside
I feel the rabbit hole pulling me
Okay, okay, let's
Let's stay home, but I do want to know is cheers named after the bar or the bar's named after cheers
Anyway, they had some lagunitas and nachos
And they went over to b and j's to meet jerry
A few questions in the back of our minds
We walked into the store and were greeted by the sound of broke down palace over the speakers
Very kind already the vibe was kind
Wow, wow
Great minds tapped in
We spotted jerry immediately as the store is only 15 feet long. He was taking pictures and chatting with the customers
Perfect. He'll be down to talk shop after ordering a single scoop of cherry garcia nice in the spirit of tc
We walked up to him and parker put out her hand for a handshake. Jerry went in for the hug
After hugging us both and taking some pics. Jerry noted grace's vampire weekend shirt and asked if she was a fan
After affirming her status as a head
Jerry mentioned that he knew vw had performed for bernie. This is already going better than we could have imagined
Well, i'm loving this
Um feeling confident. We asked our first question on the docket favorite dead song jerry without hesitation replied ripple classic
Very kind nothing more nothing less in grace's excitement. She accidentally said I love rickle
awkward
Luckily, he was kind enough not to comment on her slip and humiliation was narrowly avoided next question
Dream celebrity to create an ice cream for we were pleasantly surprised by jerry's answer
He'd explained that they'd done a lot of white men inspired ice cream jerry garcia fish steven colbert, etc
The company or at least jerry wants to expand to include flavors inspired by women and people of color
At this grace chimed in with what about alanis morissette?
Jerry was amused surprised even and suggested that maybe we were born in the wrong generation
What they're too young for alanis. Is that what he means? This jury's pretty savvy
You guys look like you're uh in college now
You're a little young for alas
He asked how we got into old music and we said we bonded over learning more about the grateful dead through an internet radio show
Called time crisis hosted by vampire weekend frontman ezra kainek an american painter musician and internet radio personality jake longstreth
Jerry was surprised to hear that tc was la based mentioning. He thought vw was based in new york
Was he ahead? How did he know the vw origin story and if ahead how much so we'd find out soon enough the next thing
You know, I actually haven't read this whole email. I'm learning this in real time
I'm kind of on the edge of my seat now
The next thing we knew jerry was heading behind the counter offering to give us a sample of his favorite flavor
Americone dream. That's the steven colbert flavor. I gotta say of all like the uh, celebrity flavors. That's the best one
I wish that I loved cherry garcia or fish food. Cherry ice cream is tough
Yeah, that's tough and the fish food is is good, but it's got marshmallow in it. It's just yeah
Americone dream. I like it's got ice cream cone. It's perfect
Anyway, he handed us a sample of americone dream and a sample of the new bnj's flavor
netflix and chilled
Wow a lot to unpack with that name and grace asked him if he was a curb your enthusiasm fan
I'm a moderate fan. Jerry replied verbatim. He explained that sometimes it's too painful to watch
To which parker responded but that's part of the fun. The three of us laugh like old friends
You know what? I'll say my parents said the same thing about curb like you guys like curb and they're like, oh, it's so awkward
It's too harsh to watch
I wonder if that's a thing that people who are like of larry's generation are like less into curb
Because I feel like the biggest curb heads that I know are all like 20s through 40s. It's like bernie, dude
I think it's a real thing. I think larry's more of an icon for millennials than he is for boomers. Oh
Absolutely. I could imagine it's just a thing where it's like watching somebody your own age
In these truly painfully embarrassing situations. Maybe it just like it resonates in a different way
Where when you're looking at somebody who's like 30 plus years older than you you can just like laugh about it
Same way that the billy eilish generation loves the office. Anyway, jerry greenfield too painful to watch man
After finishing our ice cream we headed out high on the good vibes and the warmth of jerry's kindness
Jerry is just such a good name. It really is. Yeah, I bet if bernie was named jerry
He'd be even higher in the polls
Oh jerry sanders
Jerry
Crazy jerry
Crazy jerry as we were walking down market street. We realized we had forgotten an important question
We raced back hoping jerry was still there when we entered he was at the front of the store jerry
Parker exclaimed first name basis. Jerry silently raised his arms to accept us into a prodigal
Son-esque hug. What's your favorite vampire weekend song? I couldn't tell you he replied
He told us that they knew they started in new york at columbia, but didn't know any song titles in specific
So we plugged grammy award-winning album fotb to jerry greenfield and explained what time crisis was
Thanks, parker and grace. This is what it's all about people grassroots
word of mouth word of mouth grassroots movement
He asked what kind of people you guys were shout out to jerry for being concerned with the moral character of musicians
And we told him about your support for bernie and your performance at the iowa caucuses
Which it turns out he had heard about after thanking him once again for his time jerry sent us off with words
You'll never forget you two have been the highlight of my night
Man, that's as good as it gets they say never meet your heroes, but it can work out
Sometimes this night was basically a non-stop thrill ride and we haven't even told you the best part
In between the americone dream sample and the chunky monkey sample from earlier in the night parker asked an essential question
Jerry, do you have a ben and jerry's freezer at home? That's a great question. Here we go
He told us that he has an upright fridge in the basement
Nice to fridge household where the bottom shelf is a freezer in it in it 40 pints of ben and jerry's at all times epic
I mean he's got to
At all times all times. That's probably almost every flavor. Well, or like or at least all the classics. Yeah
Yeah, I mean if you go over for like a dinner party at jerry greenfield spot
And he just pulls out just like plain chocolate. You're just like he's hoping for some chunky monkey, man
Oh, hold on. Let me go down to the basement fridge. It's like his wine cellar. Yeah. Yeah
He's got his ice cream cellar. Jerry greenfield is living in a two fridge household and in similar vein to lani's dad
He's a freezer stock with just one product with that we say goodbye
If this ever airs on tc
We would like to shout out caroline a student in burlington who introduced us to tc when we were just a couple of vw heads
What a long strange trip this email was love parker and grace p.s. Jake and ezra
Have you guys heard of bernie's yearning? It is a real b and j's ice cream flavor specifically crafted by ben and released in limited edition
During the 2016 election the title may suggest that it's a romance novel or a perfume line yearning by bernie
But in reality it is an ice cream chalk full of symbolism about bernie's movement
Bernie's yearning includes a chocolate disc at the top of the pint that represents the top one percent
You break through the chocolate disc to get mint ice cream, which represents the rest of society
I think we did talk about this once my understanding amazing is that
Even though I was talking about this a little bit on twitter recently
I was saying that ken burns to do a 10-part series on 1980s burlington
Because it's pretty amazing to think in the same few years in the same small city all the way up in vermont
You got ben and jerry starting bernie sanders becomes mayor and fish starts. There's something in the waters of lake champlain
that all those things start at the same time and
You know, I bet if you made that case in the 90s people would be like, yeah, so what?
Yeah, but now it's 2020. It took 30 years fish is still
Selling out shows all over the place still one of the biggest live bands in america act top touring act
Bernie could even become president
And ben and jerry's they're still opening up new shops. I mean, they changed the ice cream industry. Yeah
Three different people and it took yeah 30 plus years
For the significance of that heady time in burlington. Yep to go into the mainstream culture of america
Yeah, you could crazy even in the 90s when it's like, uh, the 60s in san francisco. Yeah, seriously
I think pound for pound that's one of the most influential
eras of an american city
Won't you step into the freezer
Freezer
Is
So
Won't you step into the freezer
Freezer
Interesting fact that ice cream is not an official ben and jerry's flavor. Yes. See that was my understanding was that
They even though ben and jerry are still involved in the company
They sold it to like unilever
Unilever right or one of some giant company tech owns the majority of it now, right?
So I don't think the board would let them do a political
Right ice cream, but of course, you know if it's ben and he's even if he's doing it as a solo joint
People are gonna understand side project. Yeah, it's more of a side project. But yeah, I don't think
I'm sure whatever their corporate overlords now are like you're not putting bernie's yearning in, you know
Every safe way in america like you do
We're doing fair and balanced right then you gotta do and donny's yeah
Donny's kfc. Oh, no, make america grape again
Donald trump's grape ice cream
You know i'm okay
I'm, okay real tc heads will remember way back in the day. We used to want to make a grape ice cream. Yeah
At the end of the day most people don't actually like that idea. So i'm okay with giving it to trump
Yeah, and i'll tell you folks a lot of people they don't want to see grape ice cream some really nasty people
They don't want to see you eating grape ice cream. That's why we're gonna make america grape again
Yeah, so anyway sales of grape ice cream through the roof
And more red leading states. So these like maggot dudes just like
Biting down on this like nasty grape. I'm just like thank you, sir
Your grape ice cream is so much better than bernie's yearning
Eating grape ice cream to own the libs
Rough stuff one question i've always had this is the type of thing. I like vaguely remember i've never done deep research now
I think the people
the celebrities that are associated with their celebrity line of
ice creams they get a royalty
and I believe in the case of fish they've
Never kept it for themselves as though they've always used it to fund their charitable organization
Think about how much like fish food probably millions. Yeah
Yeah, so I they've used a lot of that money to I think go towards all sorts of good stuff like helping clean up
Lake champlain and things like that local stuff. Yeah, I think local stuff to start and I like that, you know
I think they practice what they preach that are good vibes now. I do remember
Reading something or watching something about kind of late period jerry
Where when he was kind of always like wondering should I just get off the road is continuing to be?
The leader of this traveling circus bad for my health, you know, clearly it was clearly it was and
and also
You know just like is this a fulfilling life? I love playing music, but also
Now we just play to these gigantic crowds, you know
Normal questions that all musicians ask but I remember there was a quote that bernie said to somebody
Like I don't know man
Sometimes I think about getting off the road and I remember the second part of it was
I could just live off the ice cream man. Oh jerry said that. Yeah, it might have been in the movie
It might have been in a book. I read the doc series
but there was something about like kind of early 90s jerry just being like
Am I heading down a bad path?
Like i've never been off the road for like more than a few months my entire adult life
Should I just like go off to hawaii and just live off the ice cream man? Wow
He was the first celebrity that ben and jerry's hooked up with I think yeah
So was jerry just getting popular flavor? Oh, yeah, was jerry just getting fat checks
Probably dude. Okay, clearly we'll do a deep dive on ben and jerry some other time
Thank you so much to parker and grace and uh great email great email shout out to jerry greenfield
Vaguely, we're a vampire weekend. We appreciate that
Maybe he calls in some time and ben if you want to bring back bernie's yearning for 2020
Send a pint over to tc. No problem there just lately this shows a country a real sweet tooth
Okay, nick found something online that said I don't know if when this was calculated but at some point
Jerry's royalties off cherry garcia were generating approximately
200 000 a year
And I bet that was like I bet that was in the 90s. So, you know, that's a lot. Yeah, this is 97
Yeah, so it's like 400 000 500 000
Yeah, that's amazing
I was uh texting with ralston today about the sweet chili heat tequila line
Oh, yeah, guess what folks we might be making sweet chili heat a reality and he's like if we do it
we got to give the proceeds to uh
Charity or like the bernie or something portion portion a portion of one percent of profits
Those are the two classic like shady things is a portion is a portion of proceeds portion of pros
And another one which is not as popular, but I saw this one set, uh at an airport little uh food stand
this place had like super just like kind vibe branding everywhere and then
Straight up just like all this like fresh farm to table, but you know, you're an airport
So, you know, it's not not for real and it said organic and then in parentheses under when we can
Oh my god
that's
There must be something like that. Yeah, that's like such like millennial kind of bullsh*t is just like
Hey, so, you know, we started a granola company and uh, you know a portion of proceeds going to good causes and organic when we can
And just like turns out we can't very often
And after a while we just stopped making the effort
0.5 percent is a portion want me to grab a dictionary
It's a portion man technically a portion
0.01 is a portion
Top five let's get into the top five
It's time for the top five
On itunes
So this week on the top five we're comparing the top five songs on apple music right now to the top five songs
on the billboard charts this week in 1978
Why 1978? That was the year in Burlington, Vermont
The Ben and Jerry's started Ben and Jerry's. Heady time, dude. Fish had not formed yet
Bernie was also not mayor, but I was one years old. Jake had just been born the number five song on the charts. Samantha sang
emotion featuring the bgs
I mean every time we do late 70s
Bgs the gibb brothers just all over the place whether for their their own material
barbara streisand songs
But the heartache lives on
And who is the one you're clinging to instead of me
Tonight
Like the bds also did this like like where they're singing the lead vocals too
In the words of a broken heart it's just
Oh, yeah big song, oh, so they're singing like the bulk of this
Samantha's not even on this part
Such a chill song
Incredible songwriters
Yeah, the gibbs are masters. Yeah
You don't really hear their names tossed around when people are talking about like great pop song, right? Maybe pop songwriters
Yeah, maybe they don't realize they wrote they wrote all these songs, too
I would get the idea
number five
On apple music right now. We were introduced to this last time
This is justin bieber with intentions featuring quavo
Oh, yeah
real ear candy from the jump
Justin bieber, uh failed to get his first single yummy to number one, but he did get the album to number one
Picture perfect. You don't need no filter gorgeous. Make them drop dead. You're a killer
Shower you with all my attention. Yeah, these are my only intentions stay in the kitchen cooking up
Got your own bread heart full of equity. You're an asset
Make sure
It's a heart full of equity
Shout out to your mom and dad for making you
Staying in the vision. They did a great job raising you when I create you my muse
The kind of smile that makes the news
Can't nobody throw shade on your name in these streets triple threat. You're a boss. You're a bank you'll be
Can't nobody throw shade on your name in these streets triple threat. You a boss you a bank you a beast
I feel like now he's just trying to like stick to this finance theme too hard you a bank. It's very neoliberal man. It's brutal
yeah
I like that bg's better. It's like
he's psyched
On her in part because she's loaded. Yeah, and he's already loaded
Yeah, so, you know, they're forming an empire. I don't know you a bank, you know
They say people from the same social classes end up marrying each other unsurprising playing out here
That's right the tippity top the point one percent you a bank. Oh my god. That is the sweetest thing
There's a type of song where it's like all about sex that like uses a kind of like beats a metaphor into the ground
And that's kind of like fun and funny. There's something about like a love song
Where you keep trying to push the metaphor is like a little brutal, especially when it's finance. It's not like witty
Exactly. Yeah, they're just like googling like finance terms. That's kind of how it feels
We're in our feelings. It's 50 50 percentage
50 attention we need commitment. Ah, that's okay
Well, very solid r o I
I actually do like things about this song
It's it is better than yummy and seems to be doing better than yummy
But let's go back to the tasteful palette of the 70s the number four song this week in 78
Dan hill the song is called sometimes when we touch
from the album longer fuse
I just kept getting better
hunger fuse
Ooh dolly parton said this is a song she wishes she had written that one moved me a great deal
This has got to be good if dolly likes it you ask me
I love you
And I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
They mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you? Do you know this?
And what so far or do?
I'm only just beginning to see the real you
Sometimes when we touch
The honesty is too much
And I have to close my eyes
I wanna hold you till I die
Till we both break down and cry that hook is familiar. Yeah, I think it's from something else
Very normal thing to say the thing I was gonna say is like
This song sounds very familiar. Yeah, and yet if you'd like just played this for me on a piano and you're like, yeah
I'm working on this movie set in 1978 and they wanted to like write like a fake hit
Yeah, like like a kind of power ballad like am radio i'd be like, oh, yeah. Yeah
Yeah, it sounds sounds about right that hook and the chorus I think is in some other song unless I
You guys are referencing the song we just listened to
This song. Yeah, you're like, oh, no, this is a really famous song. No, no
Yeah, no reminds me of this song. It was a bad guy. His name was dan hill, too. I'm telling you
I think the song is more popular than you think it is. Wait, do you know this song? Yeah
Really? This is like an am gold. This is big big up canada way. This is our national anthem
We're not gonna figure this out right now, I mean
I'll say the verse is pretty the verse is pretty elton john like
But through the insecurity
Some tenderness survives
I'm just another writer
Still trapped
A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth
in many ways this song reminds me of
Like a songs and lyrics that I like
Romances and all strategy leaves me battling with my pride but through the year security some tenderness survives
I'm, just another writer still trapped within my truth a hesitant prize fighter still trapped within my youth
I mean, I kind of like it. I'll say it's no, uh, it's no the boxer
At times i'd like to break you
And drive you to your knees
At times i'd like to break through
And hold you endlessly it does flirt with that sort of like broadway show tune. Yeah
And I know how hard you've tried
I've watched while love commands you and i've watched love pass you by
At times I think we're drifters
Still searching
Still searching did you guys mention that dan hill is canadian? Wait, he is. Yeah, that's why that's why I know the song
So i've never heard this in my life. Oh, this is deep canadian class. That's literally what it is
This is canada gold. This is molson gold. Holy
I take I take it back guys. I'm sorry influence on brian adams for sure
Well, but listen, he wrote those huge power
Bells in the 80s. Look look no, but but sign for this is number four on the american chart
So, you know clearly it did okay down here. All right, but maybe it was more prominent because canada likes to play their own, right?
Yeah, that song really grew on me throughout the course of listening to it
And now i'm looking through the lyrics the opening you ask me if I love you and I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you in what you say or do i'm only just beginning to see the real you
And sometimes when we touch the honesty is too much
So he's still trying to figure out how he feels about this person. So she asks him. Do you love me and he's
he's like
Sort of he chokes on his reply. He's like
He doesn't know how to express it with words, but then when they touch the depth of his feeling just goes crazy
He's a guy who doesn't know how to handle his his big emotions
And so she has she has some with words. Well her her love language is uh, verbal. Yeah
So she says do I love you and he's like, uh, and he's like listen, babe
I might not be good with words, but when you touch me i'm so overwhelmed by emotion
The part where it kind of leaves me
I I really actually like the beginning and sometimes when we touch the honesty is too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide and then I want to hold you till I die
This is about the die throws me off there
I wanna hold you till I die kind of an easy rhyme
Do we both break down and cry? It's like that sounds terrible. Yeah, why does she have to cry too?
she
We're just like dating right now. Why do we have to hold you till I die?
Dead man's like yeah embrace
Just the corpse of a man. Dan. Do you love me?
Okay, I
Do I love you I can't say that I love you what I can say I would like to hold you till I die
uh
Okay, or or till we both break down and cry whichever comes first
um
Okay, dan. Hopefully we'll break down and cry
Okay, dan. Well, it's been a great great month of dating. I think i'm ready to uh
to move on
The number four song swipe left back on back in 2020
Is future life is good featuring drake
This is a song that has the big switch up in the middle. Oh, right. It's like two songs
Sandwich together
I
Don't know
I can't even say this is a smooth joke, but hearing uh back-to-back canadians
maybe
Maybe just like kind of imagine some like some throwaway drake line where he's like
So something about like shout out
Too much
I just love the idea drake like little easter eggs for canadians
Baby, please say something
It's a tax cut for every reference
Feel like dan hill in 1978
Back to 1978. Ooh now we got some actual billy joel. Wow, just the way you are from the stranger classic album
Consistent aesthetic here in 78
Yeah, everything is some form of sweet ballad
God his voice in this is so sweet angelic
This album is just a monster
This is not even like the top three song on this album track one moving out
And I don't see you anymore
Oh
Slightly brazilian feel yeah
Please billy. Joel balz remind me of the small cutter. R.i.p. The small cutter. Would you sing this at karaoke at the small cutter?
Yeah, I would do honesty a lot
Oh, yeah, I remember
I remember you sending me a recording of you doing an acoustic cover of honesty
That's like a slight weezer vibe
Yeah, maybe yeah, because like yeah, honesty like the billy joel. He's like on keyboards like a little jazzy
honesty
Bar chords, yeah like
honesty
Such a lonely word
Everyone is so actually I could totally picture rivers singing that. Mm-hmm honesty
Mostly what I need from you
Oh totally. I want to look it up. I remember dig that up
In high school. I can't even remember what the project would have been
It might have been something like we were studying shakespeare's sonnets
And maybe we had to like rewrite them
To like be modern or something a lot of the sonnets the theme is about how beauty fades and I feel like one of them
was basically about
I guess it's a classic theme to varying degrees of like, uh
Meanness like my funny valentine. Mm-hmm. You know, we're basically the whole song is like
It's like baby. Don't change a thing
about your busted ass
face
No, no, really i'm okay with the fact that you're awkward and stupid. That's actually what my funny valentine is about
Is your figure less than greek is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak
Are you smart?
Dude, you know this song right?
Like chet baker does the famous version my funny valentine my funny
You know, those are the literal lyrics. I feel like maybe we did this on a really early tc
But it's the same. It's like the harsher version of I like I love you just the way you are
My funny valentine
Oh beautiful singing chet sweet comic valentine
I'll skip that
It's like the delivery and the vibe of the song is so makes you not think about how harsh it is
Your looks are laughable unfotographical
Is your figure
Less than greek like okay. Not everybody looks like a greek statue
Is your mouth a little weak, okay when you open it to speak
Are you smart
That's just so extra wow
I'll throw that on and i'll just it's more of the vibe. Yeah, just vibing out to all wow
Just a sexy jazz night pouring some wine
with your lover
But on this harsh song anyway, billy's a little sweeter. Don't go changing
I wonder if I could find this shakespearean sonnet. I'm gonna try to dig up that version of honesty. I sent you
Yeah, i'd love to hear that again. If we got any english major listeners
tell me which is the
Shakespearean sonnet that basically is saying I love you just the way you are even though you're a little
got a few problems
um back to
modern days
At number three, we got young boy never broke again. We were talking about young boy never broke again. I don't think so
Maybe one of the best names in modern hip-hop. Yeah
often referred to as uh
Ybnba young boy never broke again. He's got a song called little top
A young boy never broken is only 20 years old. He's from baton rouge
What's wrong with me?
I like that he referred to an invoice taking a page out of beaver's book
Yeah, finance is big right now finance clerical accounting
Invoice make sure there's a paper trail. See I gotta say I don't know just like I felt like justin beaver
Yummy should have been called elated. I think the song should be called invoice. That would have been sick
That'd be a tight just like a hit rap song called invoice
Or rapper named that would have piqued my interest. Oh, let me
Actually anything called invoice
I mean you could see like kind of like a band rock band called
It's it's actually better if it if they have like no sense of humor at all
Yeah, just like a post-rock. It's from jazi style band. Yeah invoice
What's about pasta? We're invoice
Invoice invoice
No, a rapper named invoice is tight if we got any rappers out there who's struggling you're good at rapping looking for a name
But you're somehow missing like the name and the kind of identity to put it all together
But we've got something for you. You're called invoice. Well, it plays on voice an interesting way, too. Yeah
invoice
That's your ad lib
Invoice
Anyway, I will manage you. I will bring you in to my company
And look a lot of the songs have to be about money. It's a pretty classic theme of hip-hop
I'm, not exactly reinventing the wheel here, but your invoice
Somebody out there is listening
Hit us up
Maybe patrick world's gonna step up
Okay. Well patrick patrick can make the first demo and we'll give it to invoice invoice invoice
Invoice
Invoice
Invoice
This week very stark contrast between these kind of like
soft rock ballads of 1978
Yeah, and the rap of uh, 2020
back to 78
clerical themed rap of 2020
Number two andy gibb love is thicker than water. Gibbs. He's Gibbs
Quick
Whoa, the eagles have been recording hotel california in an adjoining studio and joe wall showed up to play guitar on this song
Yeah, I was getting a little bit of a one of these nights
Right there
Is
Oh, yeah, that's so cool and makes them kind of low I got this sense of my love
So
Thicker than water
Thicker than water love is thicker than water gross
Leave me crying in the end
Wandering through the antelope
I can't lose verses a trip. It's a strange song
Invoice
Solid song on board
number two
this week
Oh, we heard this last time the weekend blinding lights feel like we heard all of these songs last time
Yeah, maybe we gotta switch it up because the not just moved at all
Maybe it's because we're on apple music rather than itunes now not getting quite the same levels move of movement. Yeah week to week
Oh, that's weird
Oh, this is like the 80s one
This is the weekend's first ever uk number one
It's grown on me a little it's hard for me to get over just like that the new way of feel
Just that's just not what i'm looking for right now as a listener, but best wishes to everybody who is
Congrats guys
Maybe just throw that on for a second
Hell, yeah, maybe one of the best songs ever written. Did you guys cover this one that one?
Take on me. Yeah. No, no, but you covered um, very hard to sing
What's the other one in this kind of key that you covered?
Everywhere leewood mac. Oh, no the crowded house. Did you do? Oh, yeah, we did crowded house. Yeah
Well, it's a hard one to beat yeah hard to beat
It's such a well-crafted song
I just want to point out that the weekend song is co-written and co-produced by max martin
famous and very talented swedish singer and songwriter, but
You know as much as the swedes dominate pop music. They haven't produced that many songs as good as
Take on me by the norwegian band. Aha. Oh, they're norwegian. Yeah, you think they were swedish? I thought they were english. Oh, no, no
very scandinavian
and also like, you know
a real win for the norwegians
Norway's produced some good music for sure, but it's like sweden's got this global reputation if I think norway I think black metal
Well, yeah, they famously have the black metal big pop acts out of norway
Seinfeld, can I get a number crunch on the biggest norwegian acts of all time?
now
Let's get a number crunch brought to you by
Seinfeld 2000. It's all death metal. It's all like some edm. It's all aha and then uh, let's see
Oh, yeah, royskapp. Yeah, there's some kind of oh post rock. Uh,
Kygo, oh kygo. Yeah
But look from the 80s until kygo
Maybe aha was the only group producing truly global hit songs just so people don't think i'm just
overstating it. I mean
Come on, this is really
This is very similar
This is more like minor right
I think they probably
took
and then they were like
They're like let's make it minor instead of major but it's just ahas has such a better
The funny hook thing it kind of ends up sounding like the war on drugs a little bit
Oh, yeah, I could see a little bit of war drugs on war on drugs vibe
Gang gang gang gang gang gang same tempo
Yeah, it's like could have been minor but starts a little minor but this is just such a better synth hook
It makes the the weekend synth look seem kind of clunky
This song recently broke the billion view mark on youtube. Oh, really? Oh, it's such a classic video. Yeah, is it the one with the drawings?
Yeah, yeah
It's the second song from the 80s to do that wow, congratulations aha and all of norway
Today is another day to find you shine
I love this part
Just takes you right into the chorus in the perfect way
Also
Very good looking. Can you picture the guy in the video? Yeah, he's very handsome
It's like like a george. Michael vibe. Yeah, you know, it's weird in the 80s good-looking men
Were also good songwriters. I don't think it happens as much these days
Because I feel like duran duran they wrote their own songs. Sure
George, michael george. Michael produced and wrote his own stuff. I mean, honestly bruce
Would you say bruce in the 80s was good-looking?
Yeah, of course, but bruce
Bruce has that underdog flavor like he'll and he might be maybe 85. No, no, but he might be a humble guy
but when he talks about ladies, like when he talks about himself in his books and interviews, he's always like
Was I the best singer out there?
far from it
Best guitarist I could throw down a lick but I couldn't compete with some of the guys in my neighborhood not even close not even close
What I could do I work my ass off to write songs and even when he talks about the 80s. He's like
I spent so many hours
lifting weights up and down in a pointless rhythm just
To build up my arms like he's he might be because he's humble, but he talks about him like getting jacked, right? I'm just saying
So, of course bruce is a good-looking guy, but i'm saying george. Michael's like effortlessly
Or the vibe he gave off was like effortlessly handsome. George michael is gorgeous. Yeah, wait the guy from uh,
morton
This is what he looked like at his peak in the 80s
He's like he's like a young he's like better looking than rob love
Yeah, he kind of has like a patrick swayze vibe. He's like a better looking christian bell. Yeah
He's a better looking christian bell they should make a aha movie with christian bale, but use the de-aging technology
Just a lot of legwork martin scorsese presents
A story that no one wanted take on me
Christian bill would probably reject the anti-aging technology
Right try to do it himself
From batman to dick cheney, and I think all the all the guys all the guys take on me
All the guys in aha were gorgeous
I'm, just saying like wait am I forgetting anybody of like the pop guys just
Oh, dude the guy from uh in excess, oh, yeah, he's he's a model. Yeah, totally i'm just thinking of other 80s like
Duran Duran's. Oh, yeah, I said duran duran they the fact that duran duran just like all the heads know this but first of all
In duran duran, it's like multiple model looking guys
And you know, they were kind of back in the day
Back in the day. They were like a little bit derided
by
Like some cool people but like when you actually listen to their music. Yeah, it's funny to think about like some like
crusty garage band like the replacements being like look at these pretty boys and then throwing on the record and being like
Ah, it's pretty good
like forward-thinking production
Oh damn, yeah, like just doesn't think about like this sounds like mccartney too here. Yeah
Is this being english or australian english, okay
But it's like oh yeah, this is like the base
Like these guys really knew they're like funk and soul music and they're prog and they're
deeply into genesis and yes, no doubt
Yeah, I can totally picture like just like some midwestern punks to be like, yeah, whatever look at those pretty boys
Yeah, they can't play and then just I guess I guess the punks wouldn't care that they could play
but they'd just be like their music's not interesting and then like listen to it be like
and when the chorus drops
Actually, dude, it's a pretty good hit hook you gotta admit
Robert palmer. Yeah. Yeah sort of they're having a lot of fun on keyboard. He has like a mitt romney vibe
No, i'm not big on robert palmer, but wait am I forgetting anybody these days who's a pretty boy
Who can write who can write and just sing his ass off does bieber, right?
So I don't want to get in trouble here. I think writers in every song. I look here's the thing
It's not like a band. I get it on the aha song
Take on me the credited writers are I think the three members of the band. What about harry styles? Okay. Here's what i'll say
Because I respect all pretty boys
I don't want anybody
I don't want anybody thinking that i'm playing favorites with pretty boys
And then i'm saying oh this pretty boy is more of a has a little more musical flavor more of a songwriter
I'm equal opportunity all pretty boys are valid
I'm, just saying like
Okay, you're right. Some people would be like well, what about bieber bieber? I think is talented musically he can sing
But he's never sat down if bieber even with two other guys from yeah his where's he from ontario?
Yeah, stratford ontario if bieber and two random dudes from growing up in stratford
Wrote a song like take on me. I would make the case. I like bieber. He's come close
But he hasn't produced a song quite as transcendent as take on me
He has like four or five like excellent songs, but even then he's working with like really established
Yeah, yeah different model and I know other people would say sean mendes
But sean mendes is just starting and he seems like a humble guy. He's very talented
Maybe he'll be the guy but he hasn't quite he hasn't produced a take on me yet. You said harry styles
Yeah, I mean hannah was blasting that harry styles record around the house for a month or two. There's some tunes
Yeah, he's sunflower volume six, right? Right?
We've gotten a lot of letters actually asking for the tc take on harry styles and uh, oh, yeah
We don't we don't need to have one. We'll do one. Eventually. I'm a fan
harry styles deep dive
And actually, you know because some people were like, oh you got to get some he's got a song called sunflower, too
And some people thought it was vampire weekend-esque
I didn't really hear it
It was actually pretty beatles-esque. It has this like cool like baroque beatles
you
I remember thinking the singles off the harry styles
Album were the weakest on that record
They were the most like sort of down the middle sort of generic pop and then the rest like the deeper cuts on the record
Yeah, I remember kind of liking that song was interesting. Yeah, sunflower. I gotta go spend more time with the rest of the record
Yeah, now I feel like I painted myself into a corner where i'm kind of
Throwing some of today's pretty boys under the bus. They can take it. They can take it
And first of all, i'm i'm a fan of all those guys, but it's a different model
Those were bands. Those are guys that grew up in the neighborhood in a certain town started a band
They were all really attractive. Yeah, and also because here's the thing sean mendes
Bieber harry styles, they all are straight up
talented musicians and writers
I don't want to say that you have to be a great writer. You have to write a song by yourself
I feel like i've some of my best records of songwriters been with other people too
And I actually I know that I work just as hard
You know when I co-write with somebody as when it's by myself, so I don't want to like get into that whole thing
But i'll just say like yeah, george. Michael. He starts wham with his buddy from growing up
Aha, three guys start a band duran duran bunch of friends
What we're not seeing is quite that level of
Amateurness in that they were amateurs who came together and then pop transcendence
We're not seeing quite that. Yeah, I think i'm going to develop some kind of a ranking system
There's three categories, which is songwriting chops
pop success
Looks and looks
And I just think in the 80s then diagram the highest score you can get is 30
Which is 10 for each one of those I like this and I think in the 80s
Is the only time I can think of multiple people who are getting perfect 30s
On their pretty boy. It's songwriting chops looks and what uh pop success. Oh pop success
Because yeah, I don't want somebody being like well, what about here was this kind of like indie pretty boy
He wrote some good tunes and i'll be like, yeah, man that didn't go platinum, right? Yeah, just somebody who's like
He's a good looking guy, I think I don't really remember. Yeah, I can't I can't believe I think he is a good looking guy
But yeah, okay. No, but here's the thing. These guys are like square jaw straight
You know what? I don't even want to use the word pretty boy. We're talking about gorgeous men like models
We're talking about model. Conor oberst is not model level. These guys no shots fired at con
He's just listening driving around nebraska just like man, whatever
No, these guys, you know what? It's fair
You pick the best looking guy from durand duran the best looking guy
From aha, and then george. Michael you could put on a freaking fashion show. Oh, yeah
I think the 80s are also like where the idea of a pretty boy
is created
I also like that. Right?
Yeah, most of the music like all the 90s music was reacting to all these pretty boys
Right and now we're like reinterpreting that as like that was actually really cool. Yeah
Like kurt cobain looked like
Well, kurt cobain is low-key. Very handsome. Maybe not that low. They deliberately were like
right
mtv is creating a
Direct. Oh, yeah, right. Oh, yeah vehicle
And I think there's a lot of anger from the less pretty 70s stars who are just like what about me?
No, but look kurt kurt cobain and nd vetter. They're both pretty boys. First of all, we have to differentiate here. Um,
Because vetter's not a pretty boy. He's a pretty boy
Interesting. He dressed it down
He dressed it down because he didn't want to be like he's more rugged the guys we're talking about
You have your cuties gavin rossdale. Oh, yeah, that's a pretty boy
That's funny. I had this whole if he if he was in a band in the 80s
He would have looked he would have fit right into durand duran
Look, you got your cuties. You got your pretty boys and then you have your just gorgeous men
We're talking about gorgeous men here greek gods and also by the way, we're not saying that this
I'm, just talking about by a certain kind of fashion magazine standard of strikingness
You know, right, right, right. There's all sorts of cuties and pretty boys
These guys are just and also again, it's these guys are scoring a 30 on on the act. It's just out of control
I love this metric, but I would still say even within this system the ultimate achievement of pretty boy
Because here's the thing who's a really hot male model now who's the epitome of good-lookingness now?
What about that? Uh that convict guy who blew up on instagram? Oh, yeah, jeremy jeremy meeks jeremy meeks
So this would be yeah, he was kind of like a notable
Striking gorgeous man of our era. So you got to understand like this would be like if jeremy meeks
wrote and produced
What's like the take on me of our era despacito this would be like if jeremy makes wrote and produced despacito by himself
and
You're just like what's the story with this guy and you're just like, you know, he was just like a local songwriter
He's from a he's from a small town in texas
And he just wrote and produced despacito and like and then it became the biggest song ever
I know i'm going a little bit back and forth between gorgeous men pretty boys, whatever
But as far as the pretty boy act when everything comes together
I want to know if you can come tell me a song that was written by the singer
And perhaps they're friends from the neighborhood. I think that take on me by aha in terms of looks pop success and writing
Is the gold standard 30 for 30 is 30 for 30
Maybe it gets bonus points, too. I don't think anything beats that in terms of being like the song is incredible
The song is iconic and a huge success and then you see
The people who wrote it or at least the one of the main singer and they're stunning and they're just stunning
If anybody can beat that i'm putting my cards down on the table and saying that take on me by aha is the ultimate
pretty boy pop success
Anyway, I love that that was
Where are we? I love that that wasn't even on the well that came out of the weekend somehow. Yeah number one 1978
You're not gonna believe this
It's the bg's. Oh my god. Hell of a family
You know, I was talking about recently, you know when you do um, uh cpr class they tell you um
That the way to remember the tempo to push on somebody's chest is staying alive really seems fast
This is standard like i've taken classes not that long ago and they talk about this
But I have an issue is that and look I think there's some other sons. I think they said maybe like
Maybe mrs. Robinson is the same tempo, but I have a problem is that thank god knock on wood
I've never had to do anything. And by the way, it's always worth checking this stuff out
They say these days they put a little more emphasis on the pushing rather than the blowing in the mouth. Okay
People are more like just keep that heart moving. Hmm
I've heard people say like yeah, some people get too hung up on like the oh
Am I gonna put my lips on the just like just push on that heart and you got to push hard, too
It's it's never taken a cpr. You never pushed on the dummy or anything never had the occasion to take a cpr class
It's a decent skill to have and look. Yeah, the main thing they said is like if you don't remember anything just
You call call 911 put your phone on speaker put it down and just start pushing on the sternum
And you're literally singing staying alive
Well, but I have this issue is that for some reason I can picture staying alive
I don't know if there's like some rap song that samples it I can very easily picture it at two different tempos
like for some reason I can picture like this kind of slow version that's like
I can picture like the chopped and screwed version somehow, but it's obviously it's fucked up because you guys are arguing over this
While someone's just dying in front of them. It sounds like a badass and i'll sketch just like not like a badass and i'll 90s
It's like no, no, no, it's
It's
It's the mark of a good song and kind of it just kind of sits at any tempo
But yeah, so that's what's messed up is when you hear it and sounds fast
That means this is not the song you should be using to get the tempo for
For pushing on somebody's chest. Maybe they're just using it because it's a
a pun
I guess it's the right tempo people try staying alive. I mean
It's faster than it's fast
But it's not fast for saving my heartbeat faster than my resting heartbeat
But I don't know anything about cpr
Okay, maybe there's some i'm looking at an article about songs to do cpr to
The new york presbyterian hospital collects songs that have a tempo between 100 and 120 beats per minute. So that's pretty wide margin
You could also do girls just want to have fun
Oh, wow, right. So it's not like some guitar hero thing where it's like it's like you're dropping two bpm. Oh
Yeah, I guess they just want to like probably remind people that it's like you're all freaked out don't be going like
And don't be going like
It's like it's not black sabbath, right? It's a little faster
The number one song still on apple music this guy's just killing it roddy rich the box
So
All right, I gotta go
That was this week's time crisis. We'll see you next time. Thanks for that subject. I gotta bounce
time crisis with
Ezra king
One
(whooshing)
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