Episode 124: The Lost Episode
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Transcript
Time Crisis, back once again. We face time during the crisis to make the crisis
feel a little shorter, a little less time to be in a time crisis. Anyway, on this
episode we're talking once again about Chunky Dunkies, plus Burger King, Jonah
Hill, Jersey Shore, LA Takedown, and cars. Time Crisis with Ezra Koenig.
Time Crisis back once again. How you doing, Jake? Good. I shaved off my beard
today. Yeah, unusual for me the last few years, but it's getting
hot. I felt like the move. In previous summers you just went with beard? I feel
like I've just been beard like 90% of the time the last like two or three
years. Does that sound right to you? Like if you picture me, do you picture me with
a beard? Well, I think I'll always picture you without a beard actually because I've
just known you longer. How long have we known each other now? About 15. Yeah,
that's weird. Yeah, no, I think literally 15 because... Yeah, 05. Yeah, 05.
Meanwhile, Seinfeld appears to be growing a beard. Hey, what's up? Hey, man. You got a
beard now? A little bit, you know, I've never really been able to grow a beard.
That looks like a pretty full beard actually. You know, I think that I just
never gave it enough time before. I got impatient or I'd be like, "Ah, it's been
two weeks. I can't grow a beard. I'm done." And sometimes you just need to, you need
to wait a little. It's also not very Seinfeld to have a beard. None of the
the male leads on Seinfeld ever had beards on the show, right? Yeah, there was
an episode that opens with George and Jerry both having grown mustaches and
it's just kind of like a visual, it's like a sight gag and then they, they're
like, they both decide that it's just not them and then I think Kramer later on is
like, "Oh, we're not doing that anymore." Can you guys think of any sitcom character
that has a beard? Sure. Owl from Home Improvement. Okay, good call. Although
that's a very specific role. Yeah, how about like the lead, the lead of a show
with a beard? I guess I picture the dad from Family Ties. Right. I'm already like
a little bit young for that show. I saw it in reruns but for people who don't
remember or weren't around at all, that was an 80s show that was about two
middle-aged former hippie parents raising their kids in the 80s so they're
kind of liberal and then they have this one son famously played by Michael J Fox
who is Alex P Keaton. That's also a line from Time Crisis favorite Summer Girls
by LFO. I feel like he was all like preppy and yuppie, he'd wear like a tie
and they'd be like sitting around in their kind of like little crunchy
kitchen and he would just be like looking at the paper just be like, "Dad, dad, Ronald
Reagan, he's doing wonders for the stock market." And anyway, I think that dad had a
beard because he was like, he had that look of like aging hippie dad in the 80s.
I wonder if that show would be interesting to rewatch. I'm sure there'd
be some cool cultural references. In fact, I'm starting to become like so
monomaniacal but the first thing that just flipped through my head was I
wonder if there's any references to The Grateful Dead on Family Ties. I think
like maybe the other daughter, she was more down with the parent but I could
just picture them being like, "Alright, you're finally old enough to babysit,
Alex, like we're going out. This is our big weekend." And he's just like, "Dad, I can't
believe you guys are still going to see The Grateful Dead. I mean, are you kidding me?"
And then the dad starts gloating like, "Listen, Touch of Grey, the top 10
Billboard hit." Yeah, but come on dad. Old guys still got it. It's old stuff man. I like New Wave.
I like Huey Lewis and the News. Way more modern with their use of drum sounds and
synths. Well, hold on Alex. Jerry's actually been doing some interesting MIDI effects,
especially during the Space Jam. That would be pretty tight. That really seems
like that would have been a joke on Family Ties. On the Alex P. Keaton
Wikipedia page, it says that he enjoys music of the big band and swing era. Oh my
god. But secretly enjoys rock music. Oh my god, rock is too out there. So he's so
conservative that it's not even like he's old versus new. He's like, "I gotta
tell you." To his parents, just like, "You guys with your whole hippie acid thing,
you ruined popular music." I like, you know, the big band era. Yeah, he's rejecting all
post-war culture. I gotta say dad, I'm really not feeling your whole post-war
culture, man. I guess that kind of tracks like an 80s kid who's like into
following the stock market, wearing ties, and he just wants to listen to
big band music. Like the Glenn Miller Orchestra? Yeah, he's probably not even
into like the cooler stuff. Just that Glenn Miller. He had a killer band. Miles
Davis and Coltrane? Way too far out. No, that's crazy. Yeah, he's not even into
like Duke Ellington. No, and also yeah, he's probably like racist too. Just like,
I'll tell you man. Best jazz musicians? Glenn Miller. But actually, Glenn Miller is
a respected jazz musician. I don't really know what I'm talking about.
Anyway, Alex B Keaton, kind of a stand-in. But yeah, the dad on that show had a
beard. But I feel like actually it's not a good answer to your question to start
throwing out various sitcom dads. Was there ever like a 20-something sitcom
guy with like a beard? Or that just like would read as too old? Yeah, and I'm not
up on the new sitcoms at all, so I don't know. I feel like beards, is it fair to
say that beards are more common in society today than they were 30 or 40
years ago? Like now, it's like I feel like most baseball players have beards. But
back when I was growing up, it was rare for a baseball player to have a beard.
There's the way in which beards are kind of, fairly or not, but associated with
kind of like the 2000s hipster culture. And then there's this thing about like,
yeah, like kind of a Portlandia guy who puts oil in his beard. It was considered
a trend that kind of had something to do with the neo-hipster, put a bird on it,
Portlandia, Decembrist kind of thing. I'm not saying that's fair, but that was a
stereotype. I'm not saying I agree. Do you think that that stereotype was reaching
the like broader population, like in the suburbs? Yes, I think it's trickle-down
hipsterism. When I picture this kind of mid-2000s hipsterism, which Vampire
Weekend maybe like vaguely intersects with, but not exactly, it's like a
different school. I picture this kind of, there was like a store in New York, it's
probably still there, called Freeman's Alley. There was a store and a restaurant
there that had a little bit, it was the first time that I at least had
experienced this kind of like neo-lumberjack, like fancy pickles, 19th
century cocktail comeback sh*t, sepia-toned pictures on the wall. You know,
whatever you call that, that kind of like 19th century revival hipster thing. And
I'm sure, I don't want to be too New York-centric, I'm sure there are also
versions of that popping up in London or Montreal. Austin. Yeah, I know it's not
New York, didn't invent it. I just happen to be in this one big city. And then I
started going on tour and I could just see like Clockwork as suddenly like, okay,
so picture like a restaurant like that, that's in one of these hipster cities,
that's just like, you go there for the first time, you're like, what? You're
selling a $13 Bloody Marin? It's like, well sir, it has five oysters and hickory
smoked bacon, you know, like all that sh*t. And you go, wow. And then meanwhile, in the
other towns, you just have your standard bar and grill. And these places couldn't
be more different. It's night and day. One place is the $14 crazy Bloody Marin,
the other place is just like, we're not into that bullsh*t. But I'll say over the
decades, as I started to tour and see more of the world, those things converged
a little bit. And now a lot of cities have a bar and grill that you might even
go watch the game at, but it actually wouldn't be that crazy if they had some
wild $13 Bloody Mary with hickory smoked bacon that came in a mason jar. You know
what I mean? It all kind of converged a little bit. And obviously I'm
talking about food and beverages, but I think stylistically, there's a look that
in like 2003, 2004, you would have found in like the Vice magazine do's and don't
section that would have seemed like, who's this kooky dude paying $350 a
month for his apartment in Williamsburg with like a wax in his mustache riding
like a bike, wearing like some weird old thrift store, like Hawaiian shirt kind of
thing. And then I feel like now you might see that guy just like sitting in the
stand at a, you know, a baseball game anywhere in the country. And that guy
like literally like could not give less of a f*ck about like Williamsburg, New
York or Portland culture. You know what I mean? I feel like beards were maybe at
their ebb in the 90s. Cause I remember like when Soundgarden came out and Kim
Fahill, the guitar player had a beard. I was like, Whoa, that is a trip. A full
beard. Yeah. Yeah. He had like a full ass beard and it's, but now it's a lot of
like rock band with a beard. Yeah. No shocker there. But like Fahill with the
beard, granted it was a long beard, but it was like, Whoa, I'd never had seen
like a contemporary musician in the eighties or nineties with a beard. ZZ Top
exclusive. Obviously. That's true. But that was like novelty beard. Did we ever talk
about the ZZ Top documentary on the program? I don't think we have. I actually
haven't seen it. Oh, are you kidding me? It's a source of shame. Actually, I feel
like the Hank Azaria topic of who is the best American rock band, which still
keeps popping up. Cause like on Twitter, people were tagging us that like on ESPN
there was a show where they're talking about it. Remember towards the end of our
conversation last week, this is actually week three of the topic, which is very
impressive for time crisis to really continue something. Remember we were
kind of like zeroing in on this point that America is so big that so many of
our great bands, they're excellent, but they feel regional. And the idea that
they would represent the whole country is silly. Like Allman Brothers, Leonard
Skinner and Southern rock, whatever. What's really amazing about ZZ Top and
what's hilarious in the doc is that they kind of had this realization at a
certain point that they were like, we're going to put Texas on the map. And they
do this tour. That's like the Texas tour where they take Texas to the rest of the
country. And they were like, bring in like, they basically brought a rodeo to
arenas, just like bringing like, you know, longhorns and like they had like a
vulture on stage.
Wait, they brought like steer like cattle.
Yeah. And I think that was, wait, that's insane. I have to watch this doc.
You got to watch it. It's amazing. And also they're cool as hell. I always like
like ZZ Top. I always like playing Lagrange on rock band. That was like on
the first, or no, Guitar Hero. And then you know who always was a big fan of ZZ
Top, like going back like 10 years ago was the Chromio guys. They're always
just like, their videos from the 80s are just a masterclass of just like
storytelling. And their songs are so funny and cool. So anyway, ZZ Top is a
really fascinating band. But I was thinking about how, again, they're just
such a Texas band, and they owned it. The idea of saying like ZZ Top is the
American band. It's like Texas already is kind of like its own country. They
leaned into that idea. So it's like, yeah, they own Texas. And there's so
many bands like that these iconic American bands that are such exemplars
and interpreters of the culture of the place that they're from. But there's
just so many.
I think that's kind of beautiful. That there's still like regionalism.
Yeah, well, unfortunately, a lot of these bands are older. I think
that's true.
This is all 40 years ago. 50 years ago.
In the doc, they kind of imply that Texas as we understand it today, which
is like, as far as like the mega brands of American states, we would put Texas
as easily top five. Right?
I mean, maybe number one.
Maybe number one in some ways. I mean, California is a pretty strong global
brand.
Yeah, it'd be California than Texas.
But they kind of imply in the doctor just like listen, man in the 70s. Like,
you know, Texas just didn't have that kind of like the same rep. People from
Texas, of course thought of it as being this unique culture. And of course,
there's famous from Texas, but it just didn't quite have that California s
like global brand. They're like ZZ Top help put that together. Anyway, the
reason I thought of it is because you were talking about their beards, which
obviously were like, red as kind of like semi ironic, like, whatever. But the
actual story behind their beards, which they tell in the doc, is that after they
did their big Texas tour, it's late 70s. Everybody's burned out as three of them
kind of go their separate ways. One of them goes to London starts checking in
on the nascent punk rock scene. Really? Another dude goes back to the work at
the airport just to work a regular job and clear his head.
What was he doing at the airport? Like baggage handler?
He was a baggage handler. And he was like, you know what, he's like, it was
great, man, because nobody treated me like nothing special. I was just working
with the guys, we go get a drink after work. It was great. But anyway, so they
have this kind of year off after almost burning out working so hard. And then
they kind of come back together. And two of the dudes just have these long
beards. And they're just kind of like, hey, look at that. And that's like the
origin story is that they just took a year off. Look at that we both grew long
beards. And then famously, the third guy, the drummer, who didn't have a beard,
his last name is beard.
I love that.
Well here it's fine, if you got the time. And I tend to get just silent. And here it's tight, almost every night. But now I might be mistaken.
Time Crisis with Ezra Koenig.
But anyway, outside is easy to have your right there weren't a lot of
beards. And when I think of 90s facial hair, I'm picturing like a Chris
Cornell, like a little goatee or like a small little mustache with a soul
patch. A big beard was not hot in the 90s.
The goatee was a funny vibe.
The goatee was very 90s.
I also had this like, funny idea of like, what if like, a major politician or
like the president had a goatee?
Maybe I brought this up before the show. I just think it's the funniest
thing. Like, what if like Bill Clinton in like 1997 just grew like a Mark
McGuire style like goatee?
It'd be so weird.
When's the last time an American president was like routinely wearing a
beard? Am I forgetting something or do we have to go back to like 19th
century? Like old timey like Rutherford Mays kind of sh-t?
I mean, what about just prominent politicians? I mean, it's just
something about the beard is still, you know.
Ted Cruz has a beard these days.
Oh, yeah. And people are like, weirded out by it, kind of.
Yeah, yeah. He caught some flack for that for sure.
He already weirds people out, but the beard just put it over the edge.
I can picture like the leader of like a smaller European nation having a
goatee.
Wait, Seinfeld. This is a tough one.
So, you know, no harm, no foul if you can't deliver.
But can we get a number crunch on world leaders with goatees?
Yeah, I'll get on that.
I will say that there is a Wikipedia page devoted to US presidents with
facial hair as well.
Also, Justin Trudeau is currently rocking a beard.
Canadian Prime Minister.
See, this goes to my theory that beards are fully, they're more ubiquitous
now than ever.
Here's also a very vague guess.
Is it possible that like mass production of like disposable razors and
shaving cream and stuff and obviously handheld razors in post-war America
made it much easier to shave and suddenly being clean shaven was like a
symbol of like having your **** together?
When beards came back into fashion in the 2000s, there was this funny thing
that it didn't seem like, oh, getting back to like the crunchy 60s.
It almost seemed like it was getting back to like the 1890s.
And I feel like people would joke about it.
Like some of the beard styles, it connoted a full on different century.
You know what I mean?
Yeah. It wasn't like a 60s hippie thing.
I think there was something that maybe this is a total guess, but maybe
starting in the 50s, having a beard, like, and then the 60s, like madman era.
I think maybe if you're like working in an office building, you had a beard.
People would look at you just like, kind of like, hey, Abraham Lincoln, you
know, like, how's the civil war going?
You know?
Yeah.
Or you're like a weird bum or something.
Yeah.
Maybe it was kind of like, guys, you can go buy six disposable razors for a nickel.
Get your **** together.
I just did a geopolitical number crunch here.
And unfortunately, it seems like goatee is too specific a facial hair
designation for any article to focus just on goatees.
I do have a lot of lists of world leaders with beards, and one of them does have
like a subcategory of goatees and it's very rare.
There are only four world leaders.
This is from 2014, mind you, but there are only four world leaders with
goatees, three of whom are African leaders.
And one of them who is the Sultan of Brunei.
Not sure if he's still in power, but I think that a lot of these places
will just lump all beards together.
They're not going to make that distinction because it's too specific.
Interesting.
Great research, Seinfeld.
That was a very strong research.
Thank you.
On the fly.
There's a look of like a goatee that I associate with like one of those, like,
you know, early Soviet guys like Lenin or Trotsky.
Did Lenin have a goatee?
Yeah.
And I feel like he's the kind of goatee that he's like waxing.
He's like Williamsburg style.
Although, you know, it's funny when I search Lenin goatee, what
comes up is Van Dyke beard.
A Van Dyke is a style facial hair named after the 17th century Flemish
painter, Anthony Van Dyck.
You know him, Jake?
I do.
I do.
But see, now I'm thinking if Lenin and Castro had beards.
Ah, it was a communist thing.
1950s and 60s.
Or maybe it's solidarity with the proletariat or something.
Yeah, I can see that.
In the capitalist countries, they were just like, we shave our faces clean.
But you know who has a goatee?
Uncle Sam.
Oh, right.
That's a tight call.
That really throws a wrench in this.
Although he has a very specific type of goatee.
We like this.
His is kind of like the closest thing I can think of is the guy from
Anthrax that he has the long, weird thing hanging down like weird billy goat.
I mean, I used to see that with like patriotic World War II era
posters or whatever.
So maybe they were trying to recall a character from the 19th century.
Yes.
Uncle Sam was not meant to be a contemporary.
I'm Uncle Sam.
That's who I am.
Summertime.
Actually, I wanted to do a deep dive on US blues at some point because.
Oh, I'd love to.
It didn't quite come up when we were talking about the best American bands.
And I feel like at some point I was saying something about like that.
I felt like the reason that big American bands, there hasn't been a version of an
American radio head or Pink Floyd is because like that degree of like seriousness
somehow is not accepted from a big American band because America is like a
country of hucksters and charlatans in a way, like we can't even take ourselves
that seriously.
And I was thinking about even though it's like it's definitely not like a top dead
tune to me.
I do see the appeal of US blues.
There's something funny because it's like this kind of ironically patriotic song.
Wave that flag, wave it wide and high.
And the whole thing, you keep talking about Uncle Sam and P.T.
Barnum.
And I love that because it's like Uncle Sam.
And then you also throw in P.T.
Barnum and you're like, yeah, American hucksterism.
You know, there's something about that, that kind of like Cheshire Cat smile.
Then about the dead in America and not taking it all too seriously and the kind of
showbiz hucksterism.
Anyway, we'll unpack that one day.
That's a cool read.
I hadn't thought about it.
Red and white, blue suede shoes.
I'm Uncle Sam.
How do you do?
Give me five.
Still alive.
Ain't no luck.
I learned to duck.
Speak of American hucksterism.
That's too harsh, but this is very strange for TC.
Normally we get to the hot news a few months after it hits.
But weirdly, we did a whole thing about the Chunky Dunkies, the Ben and Jerry's Nike
shoe, like weeks ago.
And I guess it's because they just came out.
But it's like I figured that the Chunky Dunkies were just kind of like a funny, weird,
arguably busted shoe that, you know, a handful of like insane sneakerheads might care
about and maybe a few, you know, ice cream enthusiasts or just crunchy people from
Vermont. But then I kept just seeing it more and more.
And it's like LeBron has it and Bad Bunny has it.
It's actually just gotten bigger and bigger.
And now that they're out, Ben and Jerry's was trending on Twitter the other day because
people were so pissed off that they couldn't get them.
I know Seinfeld, you tried to cop a pair and and what you just came up totally empty.
Yeah, I took an L on the sneakers app.
So this is a major shoe and somehow time crisis.
I'm getting like sent stuff on on Instagram.
We're getting tagged on stuff.
And like for once we were like we actually identified a major news story.
So anyway, we want to find out a little bit more about like what this is all about.
So we're going to get on the phone with Brendan Dunn, who's a writer who knows quite a
bit about shoes and actually wrote an article for Complex about the Chunky Dunkeys.
So maybe you can fill us in on like what the hell's going on with the Chunky Dunkeys.
Now, let's go to the Time Crisis Hotline.
Is that Brendan?
This is Brendan. What's up, guys?
Oh, hey, what's up? Welcome to Time Crisis.
How is everyone?
Good. Thanks for talking to us.
Oh, absolutely.
So we first heard about the Chunky Dunkeys about a month ago, and we were more interested
in the Ben and Jerry's angle.
But it seems that this shoe has become like a real phenomenon or something.
Can you kind of fill us in on what's happening with the Chunky Dunkeys this week?
I would say it's the biggest shoe so far this year, not in terms of like actual numbers
produced or quantity or anything like that, because it's obviously like a limited affair
meant to build hype.
But in terms of how much people are talking about it, yeah, definitely the biggest shoe
so far this year, they released this past weekend.
Normally, you know, there's like a staggered release.
So they first show up at the skate shops to get allotments.
And then a few days later, they drop the Nike sneakers.
That's kind of two waves of disappointment that people are hit with and trying to buy
the shoes. And so when they first announced the Chunky Dunkeys, because we actually we
almost talked about it second because they announced a bunch of new SB Dunks.
And the first one we talked about was the Grateful Dead one, which we thought was a
shoe. We gave it a big thumbs down.
When we saw it, we just thought it was busted, uncool, not a particularly creative use of
like the Grateful Dead's vibe or iconography.
But anyway, so we're talking about that.
And they were like, oh, they're also doing this Chunky Dunkeys.
So when these were all announced in like the sneaker community, was there already some
reason that the Chunky Dunkeys were a bigger deal?
Or was it like the design got people excited and the hype grew?
Like, why did the Chunky Dunkeys become such a bigger deal than the Grateful Dead?
Well, so one thing is the Grateful Dead shoe isn't out yet, so it's tough to say how big
of a deal that's going to be.
I do anticipate the Chunky Dunkey being the biggest one of these SB releases.
You know, I think it has to do a lot with the design.
I think it looks so cartoony and so eye catching.
I think, too, it has to do with the collaborative partner.
Like Ben and Jerry's just feels like so much more a mainstream thing than Grateful Dead
does. It's it doesn't require the same level of explanation that some of the other SB
Dunk collaborations do. Like if you see it on social media, which I'm sure you have a
million times, like you just have to stop and look at it.
You know what I mean?
And what's your take as somebody knows a lot about sneakers?
Like when you first saw that.
Which one, the Grateful Dead or the Chunky Dunkey?
Well, actually, I'm curious about both.
I think the Grateful Dead is like a putrid looking shoe.
Absolutely. You know, and I think that it does have some DNA in the Nike SB line.
So it looks a bit like that three bears pack that they did maybe in like 2008 or something
like that. And another set of like fuzzy shoes not associated with any particular bear
other than those of storybook childhood.
But that shoe, I don't enjoy.
I think the Chunky Dunkey is actually a decent shoe.
It's my idea on it is that I would not wear it.
I could not wear it. But I think in terms of execution, it looks quite good.
And there's a lot of cool details in the project.
Like I think a lot of times we have to give brands the time to tell their story around
the shoe and figure out why they exist according to the brand, because that's very
important to me. So another one of the shoes in the same set, I guess it's not really in
the same set, but there was leaked online at the same time as the 7-11 SB Dunk.
Did you guys see the 7-11 shoe?
I did see that recently.
So the 7-11 shoe was more of like a lightning rod for conversation.
And we actually ran a post on Complex.com, one of my co-workers, about how upset he was
about the sneaker because he felt this is not something Nike SB should be doing on any
level. This makes no sense.
There's no legitimate connection to skateboarding or sneaker-dom in this.
It turns out that 7-11 shoe was actually intended for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics.
And so 7-11 is owned by a Japanese corporation.
And there's like more 7-11s in Japan than anywhere else in the world.
So it made a little bit more sense given that context.
So I do think the context around them is important.
And so I think that when I learned more about the Chunky Dunky, it made more sense to
me. I think there are some shared brand values.
You know, I talked to a guy at Ben and Jerry's who was involved, and I think that both
Nike and Ben and Jerry's kind of come from this hippie style, like 1970s
entrepreneurialism. They both have roots in college towns.
They both like, I think there's something fun that Nike SB has to it that Nike proper,
like on the on the top level, doesn't.
And I think that Ben and Jerry's kind of shares that as well.
So generally, though, the 7-11 shoe created more divisive conversation than the Chunky
Dunky went down somewhat easily in the sneaker community when that was first asked.
We were like, oh, that's fun.
That's cool. Ben and Jerry's cool association.
Yeah, I think I mean, I still think a lot of people were upset by the Ben and Jerry's.
Like, I definitely saw people calling it the ugliest shoe they've ever seen.
And I'm not necessarily mad at that comment.
You know, I do think the execution is good on it.
I think there's a lot of cool details, but I think it's important.
These things are wearable. And I don't know how much the Chunky Dunky, even just like
saying the shoes name, like as a 30 year old man saying, you know, the words Chunky
Dunky is like insane.
It's fun, but insane.
Yeah, it's funny, too, that you draw that connection between Nike and Ben and Jerry's
because before like the Jordans era, obviously I'm thinking about that because of the last
dance and, you know, the way that Nike and Jordan teamed up with each other, these key
moments in their career to become this global brand.
But before that, Nike was like crunchy.
You know, you picture like Prefontaine, kind of like a crunchy dude.
University of Oregon.
I mean, they're the Ducks.
Go Ducks, baby.
Oregon is a crunchy state.
It's a top five crunchy state.
And also I've noticed this thing maybe just in some of like the stuff that I follow
online, which maybe leans a little more crunchy.
But there's been a revival of interest in that old Nike guy who's like the hiker.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Yeah, the hike Nike guy.
Yeah. So you see that guy.
Actually, somebody did a good Vampire Weekend bootleg of that, which I love.
But you see that guy and you're kind of like, what is this funny bygone era of Nike?
Just kind of like kind vibe track and field, Oregon crunch like, yeah, Nike went on to
do something amazing and bigger.
But yeah, when you scratch the surface, that connection makes a lot of sense.
Like Vermont, Oregon.
Yeah. Crunchy homemade.
You know, like I don't know if you've been to Burlington.
I'm kind of biased here, too, because like I'm from Oregon.
I went to University of Oregon and then like my brother lives in Burlington, which is
where Ben and Jerry's is headquartered.
But I do think there's a lot of kinship between Burlington and Portland kind of being
coastal adjacent hippie type cities.
And like you said, Eugene and Burlington, both college town.
So I do think there's something legitimate there in terms of shared values or shared
origins. Yeah, absolutely.
So, yeah, in some ways, the Chunky Dunky is like a return to something that's always
been there. The Crunchy Dunky.
The Crunchy Dunky.
That should be the next one.
Another question kind of off that is you talked about that they release or at least they
announced these SB Dunk collabs around the same time, almost like it's a collection or
a pod. Obviously, 7-Eleven doesn't really fit, but we kind of wondered when we first
heard about it, we're like, wait, they're announcing a Grateful Dead and a Ben and
Jerry's thing here. Is this like SB Dunk's Crunchy year?
Is that a coincidence?
You know what I mean? Like to clarify, Nike's only announced the Ben and Jerry's one,
the one that released the Chunky Dunky, the Grateful Dead, too.
They still haven't said anything about they would never officially acknowledge as of
yet that the shoe exists.
Oh, what are these pictures we've seen?
These are like leaks.
These are people at factories leaking them or people getting early pairs through shady
means and things like that.
Even the 7-Eleven shoe, we confirmed that it was canceled before Nike ever confirmed
that it existed. You know what I mean?
I see.
I only say that to say that Nike wasn't necessarily positioning these three shoes as
a cohesive idea or a cohesive collection.
But I do think there's a lot of overlap between the Ben and Jerry's one and the
Grateful Dead one.
Have there ever been rumors of a Phish SB Dunk?
No, not as of yet, but actually Nike or Ben and Jerry's, I'm not sure who, but made
sure that the guitarist from Phish got an early pair of Chunky Dunky.
So I saw his Instagram.
Yeah. What's the guy's name?
Phil?
It was the bassist, Mike Gordon.
Mike, close enough.
I'm picturing like the Nike PR person who was like, who are we sending out the Chunky
Dunky's to? And it's like, all right, my top three.
Bad Bunny, LeBron James, Mike from Phish.
That kind of covers the Chunky Dunky coalition.
That's everything you need.
So this is kind of basic, but, you know, we don't know that much about this stuff.
So the SB Dunk is a skateboarding shoe that Nike launched like 20 years ago.
Yeah. Is it known to be like one of the Nike shoes that's like built for
collaborations?
Yeah, it's definitely a canvas for that.
And it has been since its inception around 2002.
It's interesting because Nike has a policy now where they're more focused on
actually collaborating with entities.
Some of those projects from Nike SB's heyday were things where they would wink and
nod and make cultural references to outside partners or to outside entities without
actually teaming up with them. So there's like the Heineken Dunk that never released
allegedly because of legal reasons, you know, where they have a very obvious Heineken
color scheme to it.
What are some of the other classics from the past 20 years, official or unofficial?
Yeah, so the MF Doom Dunk from 2007 is a big one.
A lot of people consider the high watermarks for Nike SB Dunks.
The Pigeon. Do you know about the Pigeon Dunks from 2005?
Jeff Staples shoe?
It's gray, like literally looks like a pigeon.
Yeah, and it has a pigeon on it.
And there was a miniature riot on Orchard Street when they released in New York.
That was a big one. The Tiffany Dunk from 2005 from Diamond Supply Co.
that's in the kind of Tiffany color way.
Nike SB is interesting, too, because it's enjoying a bit of a resurgence right now.
But it's heyday, most people would say is really 2002 to 2008 or so.
But there's been kind of a resurgence around Nike SB that's dovetailed with the resurgence
around the dunk in general, the non SB versions of the dunk.
Like Virgil Abloh did some dunks last year and Nike's reissuing a bunch of dunks this year.
So those two things have kind of combined and helped things like the Chunky Dunky out
in terms of this crazy resale price.
Yeah, well, how much are they going for right now?
You know what? It's looking like around seventeen hundred, which is insane.
When coronavirus and lockdown first started happening, a lot of people were predicting
that the sneaker resale market was going to slow down or collapse or something.
But there's no indication of that because this is a huge release.
There's also a promo. Have you seen the promo version of the shoe?
Is that the one that comes in an ice cream container?
Yeah, it comes in a giant pint.
So people are trying to sell those for like thirty seven hundred dollars.
My God. Yeah, it's absurd.
And you said we're only in the first wave.
So eventually this shoe will be easier to get and the price will drop.
No, no, no. Both waves have already happened.
So the first wave was.
So it's done.
It's done.
OK, so when we were talking about like Seinfeld was just talking about being going on
the sneakers app and not getting them, people were not just disappointed because they're
like, oh, damn, I wanted to get them soon.
It's over.
Unless you want to pay, you know, one thousand seven hundred dollars for them.
Well, do you know how many pairs were made?
Nike never really releases those numbers, and they're very, very focused on making
sure that their partners don't talk about those numbers either.
I would guess around twenty thousand.
But that's that's a guess.
That's odd, because usually if you're doing like a limited edition market thing, you
sort of like will tell people what the edition number is, you know, like a fine art
screen print or something.
You get it. This is an edition of 30.
Yeah, there's a handful of Nike projects that will number it out like that.
There was actually a four twenty SB dunk earlier this year that was, you know, X out
of four twenty pairs.
But it's pretty rare that they will be public with the information about how many are
made. Well, but your guess is twenty thousand.
Yeah. Very interesting.
Do you have a pair?
No, absolutely not.
Because you don't want them.
You know what? I do want them.
But honestly, I would probably end up reselling them.
Is it also like what's that phrase that the cobbler's children have no shoes?
I don't remember exactly what it means, but as somebody who knows so much about
sneakers and covers it professionally and you know, like all the details, has that
like curb your impulse to own them yourself?
No, not on this one.
You're still a collector.
Yeah. And I just want to like I feel like this shoe particularly is one that has to
be held in your hands or really be appreciated, because like I said, there's all
these cool details to it.
So even more than owning, you know, I just want to hold it.
So if you did get a pair, you would hold it and then like put it kind of just like
almost like an art object, like never wear it.
I mean, I would hold it and then like take a photo of me like kicking a soul for
Instagram and then probably list them on StockX for seventeen hundred dollars.
Right. Yeah, that's that makes sense.
Well, thanks so much, man.
I hope you'll call in again when we're covering shoes, because this is, I think,
one of our most informative phone calls of all time, actually.
Yeah. Anytime you want to talk sneakers, I'm happy to help.
And just for the listeners, you write a lot for Complex, but you also have your own
website.
So I'm the GM of Complex Sneakers, and then I'm also running the sneaker coverage
at Soul Collector. And I do a talk show called Full Size Run that's sneaker focused.
And then we also have the Complex Sneakers podcast.
So it's my whole life for better or worse.
Amazing. We'll definitely check it out.
All right. Well, thanks, dude. Have a good one.
Thank you, gentlemen.
The Nike's I'm for 'em, out the store I bought 'em. And on the basketball court is where I score 'em. I'm a Nike pro, I say so proud of. Acapella every show that I go, oh no. I
won't be bad if it's a dangerous thing. Never leave home without 'em. Trade in my Nike's, I won't even think about it. On my feet, the Nike's stinker. The L, the kicks are
weaker and the F is just a button. The beat 'cause I'm the sneaker. The boys, they do the dancin'. We all do the romancin'. And when I park my planes and in my Nike's I'll be
rockin'.
My planes and off the Ike, the Ike, the Ike. The Nike, Nike, Nike, Nike, Nike, Nike. That's the sneaker, the Nike, the Ike, the Ike, the Ike. The Nike, Nike, Nike, Nike,
Nike, Nike. Oh, what a rule, the Nike.
I had a small inkling earlier when we first started talking about the Chunky Dunkys. I was like, should I like try to get some? I mean, I know like a couple people at Nike.
I've hit them up in the past for certain shoes.
I actually hit up my guy at Nike more recently, not for the Chunky Dunkys, but for the, um, these ACG sandals. The Dayshuts sandals. Are you guys familiar with these?
-Did you say that you hit up your guy at Nike? -Yeah. Not for the Chunky Dunkys 'cause I just didn't care enough.
-No, but you have a guy at Nike. -Yeah. All musicians have a guy at Nike.
-Talk about that. Who's your guy? -Well, I don't wanna like-- I don't know how private he is or something. But basically--
-I mean, I don't even-- -I mean, name. I just like, what's the relationship? What's the backstory?
Well, I think the first time I met a guy at Nike was probably like 10 years ago at some kind of like festival or something where, you know, there's brands all the time
setting up stuff.
And I've always liked Nike. I mean, obviously, there's problematic elements in the history of the company and stuff, but like, I like the origin story of the company.
And just for whatever reason, it's like, that was my go-to. I don't know why.
You know? So, there's the guy from Nike giving out shoes and like talking with artists and stuff.
And I remember talking to him. I was like, "Oh, what's your-- So, you work for Nike?" And he's like, "I do artist relations specifically for music."
A lot of these companies have somebody like that. And they're like, "Yeah, there's somebody else does like actors and of course, athletes. That's a giant department."
But, you know, a lot of these companies might have one or two guys who like do music stuff.
And they were giving out, you know, they had a few pairs of shoes you could choose. And I think I got a pair of Air Max 90s or maybe 92s.
And it was cool. I remember like having an interesting conversation. So, that guy worked there for a while.
And, you know, like every once in a while, they would like send a new pair of shoes that they're like, "Oh, I thought you might like these."
And then every once in a while, which is pretty rare for me, like every couple years, I might see a pair of shoes and not be able to find them and say,
"Oh, could you help me get these?" And sometimes-- And they'd be like, "Yeah, let me see."
So, it's pretty mellow. And it's been different people over the years. But once in a blue moon, I hear that something new is coming.
And it looks like it's going to be like a real hassle to find such as this reissued ACG Air Day Shirts. I'm sure I'm saying it wrong.
Well, Jake, are you familiar with the ACG line of Nike?
No. I'm sort of like Crosby over here, man. I'm not a fashion or apparel guy.
Like Crosby, you had your time in your early 20s where you were peacocking for the ladies. You're trying out--
Right. What was my look back in my early 20s? It was maybe a Papa John's windbreaker.
[Laughter]
What was the most fashion-y moment of your life?
That's such a funny question.
Because I know there's no way that you're going to be like, "Actually, the fall/winter '98 Prada collection, it's random, man.
I threw open a copy of Vogue at the doctor's office and I was like really into that.
And yeah, I saved up and I bought this one sweater for $950." I know that's not going to be the answer.
Oh my God.
But maybe there was like a moment where I could picture you being like, "You know what? I want to go a little more in this direction."
Where you actually were like, "I want a new pair of shoes and I want them to be--" you know?
Yeah, I know what you're asking. I don't-- nothing is springing to mind.
Yeah, it's funny. I'm really drawing a blank here on like--
Have you ever coveted a clothing item, an apparel item?
I think no.
Like, the only thing that I could conceivably see getting into would be like cool, old band t-shirts.
But that just seems lame, like buying-- spending a lot of money on like an old concert t-shirt and like--
Yeah.
What if I--
It just seems very contrived.
Oh, s***.
Wait, what do we got here?
We got friend of the show, Jonah Hill in the building.
Welcome back to Time Crisis.
What's up, buddies?
Hey.
What's up? We were just-- it's actually very--
Damn, Ezra got-- Ezra's got the quarantine haircut.
[laughter]
I haven't seen you in a minute, dude.
That's true. The last time we actually FaceTimed was maybe like a few weeks ago.
Yeah, my hair's getting-- but I kind of-- Rashida was asking me if I wanted her to try to cut the back just to shape it up.
But as I see this little mullet starting to peek out, I'm like, "Ooh, maybe I've been needing that."
Yeah.
I kind of want it to grow out, but I don't want it to look too messy.
You're in what my nephew calls like the awkward stage.
Yes.
I don't think you look awkward. I think you look good, but you're in like a middle length.
No, I'm not.
You're in the decision. It's called the decision.
Because you got to either decide to go long or go back to your normal--
Well, that's what's good about quarantine is that you can just kind of ride out the decision phase
and not really think about it because it's like there's just very little pressure.
But I think I would-- I'm curious how it would feel to have longish hair now.
So maybe I just got to ride it out. My decision is to go there.
I'm stoked. I think you should do it.
Jake, how are you?
Oh, I'm doing well. Thank you. How are you?
I'm well. I'm well. I requested Ezra to talk to you guys because I have so much fun when I do that.
I needed some fun.
We're very happy to have you back.
Hell yeah.
Before you called, we were talking with a writer for Complex, among other things,
Brendan Dunn. He was giving us his take on the new Nike chunky donkey.
Obviously, you're more of a tri-striper.
I work with Adidas and that is the only shoe that matters.
Because that weirdly started to become like time crisis fashion talk,
I was asking Jake if he ever coveted an item of clothes.
And the answer is no. His whole life, which obviously, I don't think you or me can relate to that.
I respect it.
No, I respect it too. I was actually-- because I was just thinking like,
Jake, if I hit you up one day and I was just like,
"Dude, there's like a super rare early 90s guided by voices shirt at a vintage store in Tokyo.
It's $275. It's about to go."
Yeah, right. It's like $675.
$675. If I pull the trigger right now, will you pay me back and I'll get it for you?
Would there be any flicker of-- and it was like sick.
It was like an early guided by voices shirt.
I would be more touched by the gesture of you reaching out to me
if I wanted to get the shirt than I would have any interest in the shirt itself.
That's called a good person right there, dude.
And also, it is kind of--
Your head's in the right place, bro.
If I was being a good friend, I would just get it for you because that'd be like a great gift for you
versus just like, "Dude, I'm talking to the guy right now. If you Venmo me, I will purchase this
for you."
Yeah, because then I'm in a situation where I feel almost obligated to get the shirt.
You've stumbled across this discovery.
Let me ask you as it were with Jake,
does the Venmo have to go through first before you buy it if he promises he's going to Venmo you?
So, you have to see the transaction is complete before you go with the credit card into the shop?
It's like 3 AM in LA.
I'm in Tokyo during the day and I'm just like, "Dude, dude."
Like Jake wakes up to 10 texts and I'm just like, "Bro, the Venmo didn't go through.
I had to let it go."
Some kid bought it.
Dude, there's a kid right behind me in line and he was just like, "I'll take it."
But because this episode is turning into sneaker talk a little bit,
tell us a little bit about it.
I have a sneaker, dude.
I have a sneaker coming out July 11th.
Well, yeah.
I wanted to ask you that because you announced your Adidas collection,
but has anybody seen anything from it yet?
I can show them to you and you can react without giving away details.
There's leaked photos online.
So, my first shoe that comes out is a Superstar that I designed.
That comes out July 11th.
And yeah, I just work with them and they're amazing and they let me like,
you know, I'm kind of like their in-house director.
I directed like the Superstar campaign and then they let me design shoes and clothes.
So, the first drop, like the first thing is the JH Superstar.
Oh, sick.
Tight.
I like it.
It's very simple.
It's kind of the opposite of the Chunky Dunky in some ways.
It's a little more elegant.
Yeah, I tried to go for like, you can wear it with nice clothes.
It's essentially like you could wear it like if you have a job.
You can-
Yeah, it seems wearable.
Yeah.
So, I'm pretty hyped.
And what's the like, you know-
You guys will be getting pairs first.
Oh, sick.
Tight.
Yeah, because you know, it was like this really big deal when Beyonce did her Adidas line.
Ivy Park, yeah.
The Ivy Park X.
That was a big thing on social media.
It's like, who's getting a package?
Who's getting the really special like fancy thousand pound trunk wheeled out to people's
house, the full wardrobe and stuff.
So, that's kind of like a big deal.
It's like, we were also talking about with the Chunky Dunky, they were like,
LeBron's getting one.
Make sure one of the guys from Phish gets one.
It's very interesting.
Like, you know, it's a big deal.
Well, it's funny because my original version of it, well, COVID obviously changed everything
because it was supposed to come out earlier.
But I wanted to do just the only people I sent up to were like David Geffen, Clarence
Avon, Tim Cook, Jeff Bezos.
Just the old school showbiz dudes.
Yeah, Quincy.
Like hook up like five old legendary just goat music executives.
I mean, you definitely should send them to Quincy because he's a big shoes guy.
Oh, for sure.
He did it.
They're all on the scene.
He did a collab with Buscemi.
You know that brand?
Yeah.
Wait, what?
There's not Steve Buscemi.
Okay.
There's like a very high end brand called--
I was so confused.
The Quincy Jones, Steve Buscemi, Ben and Jerry's--
Yeah, you know, I called Quincy because he said, I called Quincy.
He said, hey, Quincy, you know, I like the music.
I like the thriller, thriller, like thriller.
And so I mean,
You know, we do, yeah.
Thriller, good album, thriller, you know.
There's a high end sneaker brand called Buscemi and Quincy did--
I don't know if it was his shoe or he just did the ad campaign.
No, that guy did sick ad campaigns.
He did like Quincy, like Larry Flynt, like just LA legit, kind of like older,
iconic entertainment LA figures.
I think that's such a cool move when brands, like rather than getting like the same three
like super young models over and over again.
Like when famously Celine did the ad with Joan Didion.
-Mm-hmm. -Wearing the big black.
-Yeah, it's amazing. -It's so cool when they get like older people in ads.
Whether-- and there's also examples where it's not necessarily famous people.
That's what I'm trying to do is get like just people that we always joke around who are like
the goats, like the OGs, you know?
You got to give a fair to like Larry King.
Oh, dude, no, I want like Tom Cruise.
-Oh, yeah, all the legends. -Like to wear him in space.
I want like Elon Musk's baby and like Jeff Bezos.
Yeah, the baby shoes is very important too.
One question I have is like, this is kind of ignorant question,
but what's the backstory on the superstar?
So that's-- you chose to do your version of an Adidas superstar because you--
there's a whole history to the superstar as a shoe, right?
It's the big anniversary of the superstar.
The 50th, I think, anniversary of the superstar.
So that's why that's the first one.
I have another shoe coming out later that is more like specific to what I have worn my whole life.
Just growing up, yeah, obviously, you don't have to tell us all like the--
no spoilers, but just growing up, your tri--
I don't know why I always-- sometimes I drop that on people when I'm just like,
"Oh, you're a tri-striper."
People are like, "What the f*ck are you talking about?"
I don't know if I heard that in the song,
but I always just refer to people who like are Adidas heads as tri-stripers.
I think people say three stripes.
Oh, three stripes?
Like on the Kanye song, it's like,
"If I see you pull up with the three stripes."
Ezra, that's from Tri-State Roots.
Oh, yeah, maybe it's a Jersey thing.
Yeah, I'm thinking Tri-State, tri-striper.
But the first Adidas shoe I ever knew about was the soccer shoe, the Sambas.
Because me and Jonah, if people don't know, we're basically the exact same age.
It's partially why when we first met early days,
when we were like 22, 23, we were just like instantly same generation.
We're so old.
Yeah, we're now we're pretty old.
But in New Jersey, at my middle school,
there was a year when everybody wore air walks.
All the cool kids had air walks.
And then there was a year where it was ridiculous.
Everybody had the black Sambas.
In your middle school, growing up in LA,
that was like on trend for those years of your life too?
Kind of.
It wasn't as big out here as it was on the East Coast
because I know about that, you know, summer camp Samba kind of life, right?
Like that wet hot American summer kind of Samba Jewish life, right?
But I feel like that's East Coast.
I feel like that ride.
Ours was like, I always wore Sambas.
I that's my favorite shoe.
But a lot of kids wore Pumas, air walks.
Like there's like kind of waves that go through like sort of like a virus,
you know, they kind of sweep through like kids.
Like there's just phases like at my school,
like one for like six months, everyone was in the stickers,
like collecting stickers.
That's my weird ass school for sure.
Although I do, it's funny because I still see it's stickers in a weird way with LA
because at famously at that farmer's market, there's the sticker store.
Yes, that's where you get them.
It's like, all right, you want that West Coast stickers.
And that newsstand at the farmer's market is where you get pogs when that was the way.
And my homie Alon.
We had pogs.
My homie Alon's dad, shout out to the Sobels, that's their magazine stand.
That's what they do.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Magazine stand culture is a very special LA thing that needs to be preserved.
Yeah, it's amazing.
We had a shot of it in mid 90s that got cut that I was bummed about
where he like skates up to the thing and reads the magazines.
Although Curb did one, the one they use this year
is my home magazine stand near my parent, like where I grew up.
Because it's on Pico, I'm like Prosser.
Pretty cool, huh?
Yeah.
Jonah's got to the newsstand.
All good over here.
The newsstands of LA.
Haven't slowed down a step since quarantine.
Haven't even lost a step.
Still the same entertaining guy, you know?
Stories for days, you know?
So what are the other classic Adidas shoes like Stan Smiths?
Stan Smiths are fire.
Gazelles are fire.
The Copa is an indoor soccer shoe, which is f***ing sick.
You should look it up.
It's so cool.
That sounds familiar.
Well, and also just generally, obviously, I know you got this connection to Adidas.
I'm just curious because we were just talking about Nike's.
Now we're talking about Adidas.
I do like both, but my heart lies a little bit more with Nike's for whatever reason.
Yeah, because you're a sucker.
Generally speaking.
Yeah.
Because I'm a sucker.
Yeah, because you're a punk for sure.
So I like the Nike ACG collection because that's kind of gorp core and crunchy.
Adidas never got crunchy.
I got a more European refined kind of Europe.
I'm more of like a European soccer kind of guy than a gorpy outdoor guy.
It's so funny because it's like I realized I dress like a British soccer hooligan.
Like that's just how I dress, especially quarantine.
Like quarantine, it literally looks like I'm in like train spotting,
like outside of a soccer arena.
You know what I'm saying?
I love that look.
And that brand, you were one of the first people that made me aware of that brand
Palace, which is a skating brand, but it's British, right?
Yeah, so those are my friends and I've done a lot of stuff with them and
they kind of use that aesthetic within skateboarding.
That's kind of their whole thing, like rave culture and like chav kind of like
soccer hooligan, rave culture, pirate radio.
And they work with Adidas a lot too.
And it's like it's all family.
Shout out to Lev, Stuart.
My general question then is like, and maybe also because I'm still
thinking about the last dance and revisiting the 90s.
The 90s was like kind of a Nike decade, at least in the US,
like whatever you thought was cooler with Jordan being so ascendant.
Nike just pulled hardcore into first in the 90s.
And now it's this kind of back and forth with a lot of people
saying like, no, no, Adidas is back on top.
Is that like roughly what happened?
Uh, I don't know.
I think it's kind of like, I think fashion swayed toward Adidas a lot
this decade or recently, right?
Like I think it became more fashionable, but I always rode with the three stripes.
I think it's like, it's like, it just kind of got more,
it got cooler to wear those old models that have been around forever.
Right?
Like, I think it's like more classic.
It's not like, it doesn't look all new and crazy, you know?
Like sometimes other shoe companies for me, like they swing too hard and like crazy.
And then you buy them and then you're like futuristic.
Yeah.
I like this classic.
Like that, just the ones that like the Beastie Boys wore them and like cool athlete, like Pele.
And then like, you know, it's like, like you could see it in a picture 20 years from now
and you're not going to cringe.
You're just going to be like, that's a classic shoe.
You're not going to be like, I took a weird swing on that one.
Yeah, I can see that.
All right, let's change the subject.
This past week, there was a hashtag trending that kind of combined two of our favorite
subjects, music and fast food.
The trending hashtag was Burger King is over party.
I imagine you guys are familiar with this concept called cancel culture.
And the official phrase goes like is over party, right?
That's the hashtag, the blank is over party.
Yeah.
And sometimes it's a joke.
Sometimes it's serious.
Sometimes you can't even tell, but something will set off a fan community or a group of
people.
And next thing you know, you got somebody's over party.
And do you guys know why Burger King was getting canceled?
No, what did they get canceled for?
Okay.
So basically, you know, like all, especially burger companies, I don't know why burger
companies need to be the most active brands.
Somebody named Audrey, who I think it looks like based on her avatar is probably a big
Taylor Swift fan.
She tweeted at Burger King.
I need to know what's y'all's favorite Taylor Swift song.
So Burger King wrote back to Audrey, the one about her ex.
Damn, at first I had to like, think about it because I was like, wait, what do they
mean?
And then I realized, okay, Burger King is making a joke.
Taylor Swift is often come under fire by the media by saying all she does is kiss and tell.
She only writes about her exes, many of whom happen to be famous.
And Taylor Swift herself, and of course her fans as well as often stood up to and said,
this is a double standard.
Most songwriters write about their personal lives and their experiences.
She's absolutely right.
And she's right.
I'm not uniquely somebody who kisses and tells and what about, and, you know, she gives an
example of a million male musicians.
And, and sometimes I think she even felt like that song wasn't even about that person.
You guys are now perpetuating the standard.
So Burger King thought they were being maybe kind of funny, but they actually had a very
sore spot for Taylor Swift and her fan community making this joke because their joke essentially
is that all of her songs are about her ex.
It's like the one about her ex, whichever one of those 300 ones there are.
So the Swifties, those are Taylor Swift fans.
They took great offense to this and they caused the hashtag to trend.
And I think they very quickly Burger King deleted the tweet.
I don't think you would have seen that kind of sloppiness in the heyday of the Wendy's
account.
Also, I got to say, even if Burger King was trying to be kind of edgy here, what a weird
swing it's dated too.
It's not even like a on trend Taylor Swift joke to make, you know what I mean?
Nobody's going to find that funny.
I thought it was funny.
Jake.
I thought it was funny.
Damn.
What do you mean, man?
I mean, most of her songs are about her ex, right?
I mean, here's the lesson.
Don't say anything about anyone ever because the upside is not that great.
And the downside is horrible.
Actually, I'm thinking about Burger King.
I mean, I'm imagining what Burger King tastes like right now.
So maybe it's a good thing.
The truth is, we very rarely talk about Burger King on this show.
We talk at length about Wendy's.
Probably our top burger place would be Wendy's and McDonald's.
Burger King a distant third.
Real talk.
Carl's Jr. is my favorite.
I thought, okay, but I just thought actually that you and the people, a lot of people grew
up in LA because there's this thing that people not from LA come to LA and then we go tell
our friends on the East Coast.
Oh, we've got In-N-Out Burger here.
It's incredible.
And In-N-Out Burger is very good.
No, that's not in the same realm.
I'm talking about fast food.
I don't put that in the conversation.
Oh, okay.
But the one I was going to think of that I know you ride for is, which to me is very
LA is Fatburger.
Where does Fatburger fall?
I don't put that in the conversation either.
Fatburger and In-N-Out are like a tier above.
Oh, okay.
Not even above.
They're just like.
They're regional chains as opposed to national, right?
Yes.
In-N-Out's in a class by itself and Fatburger doesn't do drive-thru.
It's like a sit down order burger restaurant, essentially.
Pretty sure the Fatburger on Vermont does drive-thru.
Okay.
Well, you don't have to disrespect me like that.
Like when we're talking about Fatburger.
Man, who's the real LA OG here?
I don't know.
I had to set the record straight.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay.
But you're saying.
Here's what I'm saying.
I put Fatburger and In-N-Out is not the same as Burger King.
Like you can't put that in the same category in my opinion.
I'm talking Burger King.
Down and Dirty, National Chains, Burger King, Carl's Jr.
Jack in the Box.
Yeah.
Mickey D's, Wendy's.
Yeah.
Wendy's.
Yeah.
But why can't you put them in the same category?
Just because they're smaller chains.
So it's easier for them to maintain quality.
Is that the theory or what?
Because they are fast food.
Different price point.
Not In-N-Out.
In-N-Out's the same price point as McDonald's or Burger King.
I don't know.
Maybe it's just a biased thing loving In-N-Out.
I put it as a special thing maybe.
It's more special.
We're getting In-N-Out is more different than like,
"Oh, we're driving by McDonald's.
Let's get McDonald's."
No.
I think it's to In-N-Out's credit that they're in the same industry essentially as McDonald's.
But their product is so much higher.
No, that's true.
But I think Jake, in some ways, you answered your own question.
Where In-N-Out maintains that quality.
And famously, people are always like, "Man, they got it.
Why isn't there In-N-Out in New York?"
And it's because the family that runs In-N-Out or whoever,
it's going to f*** up their supply chains.
They don't want to be shipping stuff that far.
There's a reason that they stay small.
So in that sense, I think your point about that they're different in terms of
their national visibility, how big they are, that kind of tracks to me.
That places them in slightly different categories.
Also, it's like supreme.
It's like when it's harder to get, you stay more high-end and relevant.
And the quality stays high when there's not 100 of them all over the place.
High demand.
So what's so special about Carl's Jr.?
Carl's Jr. to me is like, if McDonald's is, let's say, holo.
Tommy Hilfiger.
No, Burger King's Tommy Hilfiger.
Nautica?
This is good.
This is good.
Carl's Jr.'s Nautica.
Carl's Jr.'s Nautica, which is like the dope is more Helly Hansen.
Like the dopest one.
You don't think about it as much as polo, but you're like, you know what?
Solid.
Cool, bro.
When you see someone wearing it, you're like, oh, props.
You're tight.
You know, it is like Nautica or Helly Hansen.
And then I think Burger King is Tommy Hilfiger for sure.
And then I want to find out what Jack and the--
I just haven't had Burger King that much in my life.
Like, are Whoppers good?
I think there was a period when Burger King was good.
And they also were pretty dope.
The chicken fries were kind of a thing.
Yes.
Like they were like a gimmick.
And then they stopped doing it.
Well, you know, it's funny because I forgot what airport is.
Whatever airport I fly New York to LA and vice versa,
whatever airline I'm on, the terminal sucks.
Like, I'm always jealous.
Like I forgot the airline.
Like whenever I'm talking to a friend, like one of you guys, it's like,
they're like, yeah, there's like a five guys.
And there's a taco truck.
And like, you know, there's like a blue bottle or whatever.
And it's like the one I fly, it's straight up just like Burger King.
And like, whatever if like Sbarro got shut down and called something else.
Like, so I have had Burger King on those, some of those lonely flights,
you know, where you're like, you need a little pick me up like a treat.
But the chicken fries are legitimately good.
Yeah, they're fire.
They are good.
Yeah.
So,
yeah.
You know, we could talk about all I've been watching the whole quarantine,
me and Gianna started Jersey Shore from episode one.
And now we're all the way to season two family vacation.
Well, because Jersey Shore, like, I feel like the first season made such a huge splash.
I vaguely remember the second one, but it's like, they just kept going.
Well, I don't mean to bail on our other conversation.
Sorry.
I feel like I don't know.
It's all right.
I think we covered it.
You know, we figured it out.
It was genius.
So they filmed the first season summer, right?
Summer in Jersey Shore.
Clearly MTV realizes, oh my God, like, we have a banger.
Right?
So they go straight from the original Jersey Shore house straight to Miami for the winter.
And they do season two.
And they're like, oh my God.
And then I think midway through season two or something, season one airs,
or after they finished season two, season one airs, I think.
After the winter, they go to Italy.
And then they go back to Jersey Shore.
So it's really in this really short period of time.
It's four seasons.
Yeah.
Like they just kept them going.
And then fame hits kind of like halfway through.
So it's interesting.
The second two, they're like famous.
I mean, that first season was incredible.
That was like a really exciting moment.
Dude, the whole thing is a masterpiece.
Pauly D is as funny as any of the comedic actors I've ever worked with.
He's straight up hilarious.
He's great.
And I mean, the situation is such a fascinating kind of tragic figure.
I believe he's in prison right now with Bernie Madoff.
No, no.
So actually the situation is a really inspiring figure.
Unfortunately, it's Ronnie who's having the most troubles right now.
Oh, what's the story?
In a gnarly relationship with his baby mama.
And they keep getting into fights on TMZ and it's kind of hectic, right?
Mike got sober, did his time.
But even before he does his time, there's a season.
The whole thing is all on the show.
Him getting sentenced, him going away, him getting out of jail.
Yeah, it's f****** incredible.
I totally missed that.
It's remarkable.
It's like amazing.
It's just like Jersey Shore season five, the trial of Michael Sorrentino.
They all go to the f******, what's it called?
Arraignment where you get your sentencing?
Really?
Yeah.
Snooki, Snooki and everybody.
All the homies are there.
Yeah, like Snooki and Pauly D and s***.
And they're like chilling there and it's like 14 months and they're like, "No!"
I had no idea that it took like--
I mean, I remember kind of seeing that in the news, but I didn't know that was on the show.
Wait, but so then--
Then you see him getting out.
So he turned his life around.
He's amazing.
He's such a sweet guy.
It's like you love him.
You love him now.
And he was such a jerk and now he's like such a kind, kind of thoughtful guy.
He seems really sweet.
I got a question for both of you.
Have you guys ever been down the shore?
No.
No.
Isn't that part of like the intro?
I'm going down the shore.
Is that around like Asbury Park?
Is it-- that's the shore, right?
I could do the whole intro for you.
Oh, please.
I think they were in there.
A lot of the first season was in Seaside Heights, but--
All the Jersey stuff is Seaside Heights.
It's Seaside Heights because that's like a big town that I've been to.
The Jersey Shore is very long.
That's an interesting thing.
I was just thinking about that with Jersey.
Part of the reason that the Jersey Shore is such a thing is that there's not that many
East Coast states that have such a long, unbroken, somewhat straight shoreline like that.
Connecticut, you've got all these funky little islands and rocky beaches.
Rhode Island's a real mess.
I mean, it's beautiful, but Rhode Island, the bottom of Rhode Island is like Greece.
All these weird little inlets and stuff.
And then Massachusetts, you have Cape Cod, which is its own thing.
Jersey Shore is just kind of like this--
Once you get past Bruce Springsteen country, that little bump near where he lives,
then it's kind of like this straight thing.
And there's a lot of shore towns.
Some of them are really far away from each other.
Growing up, I had a friend whose family would always go to Wildwood, New Jersey,
which was similar to Seaside Heights in a way.
It had a cool boardwalk, and you would get cheese balls and shoot a gun at a clown.
And win a CD or something like that.
So I'm very familiar with that side of it.
And then there's also these other towns that are a little bougier.
They all have a different character.
But one thing about Jersey Shore, this is not explicitly connected to Jersey Shore.
Although I must have some relationships.
Jonah, you know, before Jersey Shore started, there were two MTV True Lives.
That guy's amazing.
Dominic.
I've seen it.
Okay.
So that kind of paved the way for Jersey Shore, the show.
It was a True Life.
True Life Jersey Shore.
Like I'm getting a share house.
Yeah.
True Life, colon.
I'm going down to Jersey Shore.
And so the first one was a dude.
And those both had a big impact on me.
Because, you know, I was in real time.
I was in Jersey.
Dude, True Life doesn't get enough props.
True Life is an amazing show.
Yeah.
Like strongly agree.
And really well done.
And I kind of feel bad for that guy.
Because he was like the original Jersey Shore guy.
And he, I remember he was like 40, dude.
He was kind of old.
And I feel like he was kind of looking for love down the shore.
But also getting really dry.
It was all the same themes were already present.
And I just remember that dude used this phrase in it.
That me and my friends became obsessed with.
Because he was like, man, I love going down to Jersey Shore.
You know, get away from it all.
You know, I love that North Jersey hustle and bustle.
But then you get down the shore, you can relax.
And there's like something that to us, that North Jersey hustle and bustle.
Because we grew up in North Jersey.
So the idea of like, get in the car for, you know, an hour.
Get away from that North Jersey hustle and bustle.
So then the second one that they made after they focused on a guy.
They focused on a woman.
Right.
That woman, her name was Dottie Ortega.
And she's four years older than me.
And she went to my high school.
So this is like a really big deal.
That the follow up to the first Jersey Shore true life was.
Did you know her?
New Jersey?
No, because she would have been, you know, it's like at my school that.
When you're in eighth grade, it was a very small town.
But when you're in eighth grade, you would vaguely know who all the seniors were.
But unless it was like somebody's sibling, you didn't know them, know them.
But like, you know, yeah, it's like, you know, like when you're a kid,
you'd like used to look in the at all the upperclassmen in the yearbook.
You like, they were kind of like celebrities.
So so there was this moment like, holy, wow, on TV.
So that kind of paved the way.
But those two, even before Jersey Shore, those true lives were like, made a huge impact.
There's some incredible ones.
I'm going to go on a deep dive when we hang up of some like true life.
Yeah.
The coolest one I've ever seen was there was one about gay men who are obsessed with bears,
like feeders, like obese, like 500 pound men.
Right.
And this guy is a really buff guy goes and meets this like kind of he's kind of like
a celebrity amongst the like, large, like 500 pound, like gay men community.
He's like a star.
And they go and they like have this great time together.
And he kind of they kind of explain this subculture, which is like the feeder and the
whatever the eater, maybe, you know, and it's just really interesting subculture.
I've never heard of before, but I'm like 13 sitting there like, this is interesting.
This is different than like TRL.
Like, what?
It's like vice.
It's like a precursor to vice.
Yeah, exactly.
You know, I mean, MTV had such an incredible run from the real world in the early
90s all the way through the early 2000s of True Life and Jersey Shore of like,
obviously, it's not all A plus, but just like, yeah, kind of like seeing their mission as like
exposing, you know, the youth of America, it's like the bigger world around them,
like ways that people, you know, there's like something really positive about elements of it.
I thought True Life was cool in that it wasn't making.
I don't think it was making fun of.
I think they knew some of it was ridiculous, but I think they took a bunch of subcultures
and showed them as they were, as opposed to like, you know, spinning it too crazy.
Jersey Shore just happened to be they were so nuts.
And that was a big debate with Jersey Shore, because similar to when Sopranos first was on
the air, you had some Italian American groups saying this is stereotypical.
We hate it.
Take it off there.
The show they exploit that the show is different than like True Life.
Like the show.
Jersey Shore exploits the characters.
Yeah.
And it's if I was Italian, I'm sure I'd be like, oh, my God, this is insane.
Because it's like it's almost a very cartoonish representation.
But I love them.
You know, I love them as people.
Like I've watched the show.
I'm obligated to say I just want to say I'm very close with the woman that created it.
Yeah.
The most amazing woman.
She is one of those women.
She's Italian.
Oh, Sally Ann Salsano, 495 Productions is the company like she is so.
I've seen that logo so many times.
Like with the f***ing highway sign.
And she's she's honestly she's a f***ing maniac.
And she lived like she lives there, right?
Like she's a real Jersey girl.
She's a real Italian Jersey girl.
Totally.
And she sees obviously there's like an exploitive part of the whole thing.
But just I feel like because I've had this conversation and then I got to know her.
And oh, she's it like she loves Pauly D.
Like she spends all of her time with him.
She basically moves into the house with them and shoots it.
So I think that it should give you guys a certain amount.
Like there's a certain respect that like.
Awesome.
Yeah, I thought you.
Yeah, right.
Exactly.
And you can tell because that's really cool to hear.
Like I'm obsessed with Pauly D.
Like I want to be friends with him so bad.
He is like amazing.
You should hire him to DJ an event.
Dude, I can't afford him.
He's like the richest guy.
He's got a f***ing like residency.
He's killed it.
I do remember seeing the first episode and knowing there's controversy around it.
And there's like they enter this house.
There's like a big Italian flag.
And if the idea was that a bunch of non-Italian people had handpicked people
that they thought were going to like fight and get into these like goofy situations.
They're like, come to this house.
And then they put a huge Italian flag.
I can imagine somebody looking at that being like, what is this?
But if it's actually Italian people making it.
And one thing's for sure is that even if the beginning of the show was rooted
in some sort of like people wanting to see like some Jerry Springer s***.
The truth is the people on the show by and large turned out to be
too smart and likable to be just shoved into that like goofy thing.
That goofy reality TV thing.
Although you gave me a funny idea.
It'd be hilarious if I made a show that was like all Jews like accountants.
And giant star of David.
Yeah, like just like whatever this biggest like Hacis and like Hacis accountants.
And it's like just the casting call is just like the biggest stereotypes.
Like, are you f***?
Yeah, exactly.
And then like there'd be like an uproar and then I'd be Jewish and they wouldn't know what to do.
Well, I feel like the Southies were worried about that.
And I don't think it really happened.
I think they were worried about that on Uncut Gems.
Like I think they were worried about Jews getting pissed off about their portrayal of like
a stereotyped character, right?
Like his relationship to money, his duplicitousness.
Yeah, maybe there was one or two things like that.
It definitely wasn't the...
Yeah, it didn't land.
Yeah, there was no Jewish organization, which happened with Jersey Shore, the Italian version.
There's no Jewish organization that was like, boycott this film.
It was all Jews who saw it probably.
Yeah.
Thanks for having me, guys.
Thanks so much.
See you, Jonah.
Great to see you.
Bye, boys.
Peace.
We're living here in Allentown
And they're closing all the factories down
Out in Bethlehem they're killing time
Filling half-empty standing lines
Well, our fathers fought the Second World War
Spent their weekends on the Jersey Shore
Then our mothers took the U.S.O.
I swing the dance, dance with the show
And we're living here in Allentown
This is a real stacked episode of a Time Crisis sneaker talk.
We got one more guest coming.
And Jake, this is somebody that I initially know through you, Aaron,
that has a project called LA Takedown and also a member of Richard Pictures.
But since I know him through you, why don't you set up, give him a little intro?
Yeah, Aaron Olson has a great band called LA Takedown,
which put out a record called Our Feeling of Natural High.
They put it out the week that, I think like Friday, March 13th,
like the week that like the entire United States shut down.
Just shut down, yeah.
And we have to ask Aaron about this, but I remember he had,
there was a record release show booked for Friday, March 13th that was canceled.
But for the show, they were going to do all doors covers,
which is a strong move for a record release.
We have to ask him about that.
Oh, hell yeah.
And so, yeah, and Aaron, and I also want to ask him,
I think it was his idea to start Richard Pictures.
So anyway, I've been playing music with Aaron for like five, six years at this point.
Right.
And so he's a tight, tight friend.
And Aaron plays bass in Richard Pictures.
Bass in Richard Pictures, bass in Mountain Brews.
And he's the kind of composer guitarist in LA Takedown.
Right, so he's a multi-instrumentalist, but I've often been struck,
I mean, oh, you guys are great in Richard Pictures, but, you know,
Phil Lesh, an important member of the band, him holding it down.
And I've also been struck, and I even talked about a little bit with Baio,
because, you know, Vampire's taken Mountain Brews into our repertoire.
So, you know, all the people in our band had to study those parts.
And I remember listening to it for the first time,
I was like, oh, damn, it's a little workout for Baio.
And I think he had fun learning those parts,
because that's like, specifically on the Mountain Brews song, Mountain Brews.
Yes.
Like, the bass is so alive and fun.
It's fierce.
Yes.
Really great performance.
Yeah.
Let's get Aaron on the horn.
Now, let's go to the Time Crisis Hotline.
Hello.
Aaron, you there, bud?
Aaron?
Yes.
Welcome to the show, Aaron.
Very happy to have you.
Thanks, yeah, I'm happy to be here.
Can you guys hear me okay and stuff?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Hear you great.
Totally.
I'm kind of a silhouette, but...
We were just talking about that you had the crazy timing
of having your record dropped on March 13th.
Yeah.
We want to talk specifically about the scheduled album release show
in which you were going to cover The Doors,
but that'll probably turn into a three-hour conversation.
So before we get to that, I'm sure people would just be interested,
just as like, just a musician, been working on a record,
like, what were those like couple weeks leading up to that like?
It was an ominous day, being Friday the 13th anyways,
and we were kind of like, "Hey, I'm not superstitious."
So I didn't really think much of that.
But I mean, I was just excited.
I was like ready for this album to come out.
I've been working on it for a pretty long time.
Then I got sick, actually.
Oh, wait, did you have COVID?
I don't think so, but my wife thinks I did.
I think you did, man.
It seemed like you did.
I know you didn't test positive for it, but...
That was later anyways.
Similar to Hannah, my wife, she was also incredibly sick.
And it was sort of like, it just felt, it's very specific symptoms.
But I remember, dude, I remember like the day before the show was supposed to happen,
it was still, it was in those, like, that period of days
where things were changing very quickly.
Well, yeah, that's what I'm curious about because the week of March 13th,
the Tuesday before that Friday was when the NBA and Coachella were canceled.
So I imagine you were kind of like monitoring the situation,
like everybody was, but you actually had a show that week
at an album release party being kind of like, what's going to happen here?
So when did that show actually get canceled?
Yeah, we had practice, I think that Tuesday night.
And I remember being at the practice and word came through that the NBA was closed or whatever.
And yeah, that was definitely a sign.
But I was also going to do a tour, like the next week or something in another band.
And so in my mind, I was in the discussion we had was kind of like,
well, if the venues are still open, then it's on them to close or not have the show.
That's what we were thinking that week.
And then so creeping up to the show, we had a practice.
I think it was the night before, or maybe it was Tuesday and Wednesday,
we had practices Wednesday night, Jessica, who is is the Jim Morrison of the doors outfit,
was pretty sick at practice.
She was coughing quite a bit.
And various people in the band were concerned to different levels.
I was kind of just like shows happening, like, whatever, like, just to clarify,
when were you sick?
Was that like a couple weeks before the big week?
So I got sick the next day.
Oh, all right.
So you may have caught something from the Jim Morrison of the outfit.
Indeed.
Typical, right?
Yeah.
Leave it to Jim.
But yeah, so the next day I went to work.
And I noticed that work out.
Jesus, the next day, I had like active shooter training at work.
I just remember like going into work.
And then I think I was scheduled to go on to time crisis that night, actually.
Right.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
So that was like kind of a full day for me.
I was like, okay, I'm going into work at the library.
We're having an active shooter training that's going to be gnarly.
Then I drive across town to this thing.
And so during the active shooter training, when we're all sitting there trying to be
quiet, I'm noticing that I'm suppressing a cough.
And then by the end of the day, I'm like, I have a cough.
And then the next day, which is the album release show, I was ill, like quite ill.
My wife and I were like, well, what do we do?
Like, I think we have to cancel the show.
So we canceled the show and then we're like, well, we could still go there and sell the
album because it was going to be at a record store venue.
And then that quickly just became apparent that that was a bad idea, too.
And then it was just off.
Okay.
So one question I have is now, well, I guess also it's interesting for our listeners if
they don't know LA Takedown is kind of to describe the vibe of the band, because LA
Takedown is named after a Michael Mann film, correct?
Yeah.
TV movie.
Oh, a TV movie.
I mean, I have my own vague impression of kind of like the palette of LA Takedown.
But like, how do you generally describe it?
I mean, I think the fact that this connection of Michael Mann, if anybody's familiar with
his work, especially like his early work, I think that kind of is very evocative and
kind of related to your music.
But like, yeah, how do you describe the music of LA Takedown?
I describe it as kind of mostly instrumental.
It's kind of changed through the years, I guess.
I probably wouldn't name it LA Takedown now, but it's like instrumental soundtracky
music with harmonized guitar leads.
Mostly that's like what I tell people.
And then half the time I get a blank look.
So I need to think of something better.
Probably.
Tangerine Dream ish or something like.
Yes.
Guitar solos.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Kraut rock, synthy.
Yeah.
It's moody and evocative and textured.
It doesn't particularly sound like The Doors.
[Laughter]
That's a fair assessment.
Yes.
I can safely say it is not at all influenced by the music of The Doors.
Actually, you know what it makes me think, though?
It's actually like a really fascinating thought exercise to be like, what if Jim Morrison
hadn't died and The Doors actually became the American Rolling Stones?
And they went through late 70s.
They did kind of like a some girls punk disco record.
And then in the 80s, they actually got in to some Tangerine Dream, Michael Mann movie
vibes.
Is it possible that The Doors could have dropped a 1985 masterpiece album that was like an
LA woman revisited?
And Morrison's just like, I mean, you're familiar with our classic album, LA Woman.
I asked myself the question, who is the LA woman of 1985?
I want to understand this woman.
Anyway.
No.
I think that like I bet they would have kept on making albums, but I think they wouldn't
have been good judging from like I've listened to Ray Manzarek stuff later on.
And I was thinking like I'm always interested when people get synthy in the 80s.
Yes.
And like I was like, OK, Manzarek's definitely going to get into like arpeggiators and like
all this textural synthy stuff.
And like everything I've heard was gravely disappointing.
He didn't have a Herbie Hancock-esque rebirth with the new wave of synths in the 80s?
No.
But are you a doorstep artist?
What made you on the release date of your new LA Takedown record want to do a Doors
tribute?
Well, I'll say this being in a Doors cover band made me like the Doors more or maybe
even period.
The band came about because Richard Pictures was playing a show out in the desert and we
all, Mose, the scientist amongst the group, had a bottle of like microdose, I guess, acid.
And so we all took some and for me, it definitely turned more into a macrodose situation.
And we were sound checking and I remember Aram was there, who also has filled in for
me before and now plays in the band full time.
But I remember looking at him being like, dude, can you play for me?
Because I don't think I can do this.
Like I was like getting shivery and like I couldn't like play a note.
And then he was like, I'm left handed.
No.
And then whatever.
Then we had to play the show.
Jessica Espelida was there.
She plays in LA Takedown.
After we played, she was like, guys, my 40th birthday is next week.
Will you be a Doors cover band for it?
And I'll be Jim Morrison.
And we'll do it at Gold Diggers, which is a small place where we've actually done a
thing for Jake's birthday, too.
Right.
And we're all like under the influence of something.
And we're like, yeah, that sounds great.
Like I didn't even think about if I like the Doors or not.
I was just like, that sounds fun.
And so we had to practice and then we played the show.
And I got to say, like Jessica and it's through playing the music, probably that I grew in
appreciation and through Jessica's enthusiasm.
But like most people, maybe our age, I thought they were super cool when I was a kid, when
that movie came out.
I had that double CD where Jim's all shirtless.
I had that, too.
Like my Cub Scout video submission for the video contest was a music video set to People
Are Strange.
But then I got into junior high and high school and I just I was over it.
I thought he was pretty lame.
Well, I get another.
Was it also that obviously you're a multi-instrumentalist, but we were seeing your praises as a bassist,
notably on the studio recording of a Mountain Brews song.
Thanks.
But did it have anything to do with your growth as a bassist?
Did you come to resent the bassless Doors?
No.
And you know what?
I think that's a misconception about the Doors, honestly.
Because they have bass on the record sometimes.
They have so much bass on the record.
Like I played bass in the Doors cover band.
But in the Doors cover band community, is that like a fork in the road?
It's like where some people just like, guys, the Doors didn't roll with the bass live.
This sounds nothing like the historical live recordings of the Doors.
And other people like we're paying tribute to the recordings, which is how most people
know the Doors.
Like, is that a big bone of contention in the community?
I hope so.
I'm happy to say I'm not very in touch with the Doors cover band community.
But I hope that's a real dividing line.
That would be rad.
How much crossover do you think there is between the dead and the Doors?
As somebody who's very versed in the music of both, have you ever gotten into like Hot
Water where somebody's like, oh, man, like, oh, you're in a dead cover band that rules?
Like, you know, and then you somehow reference the fact that you've done Doors covers and
they're just like, really?
Or do a lot of people like people, they're like two great California bands that began
in the 60s.
Love it.
I'd love to see the actual Venn diagram of this, but I haven't really figured that out.
I mean, honestly, I'm kind of careful.
I'm going to like, I don't spring the fact that I'm in a dead cover band to people like
off the bat.
Yeah, I kind of have to feel it out.
Like at my work, I don't think I told anyone until like two years in.
Oh, that's deep.
That I play in a dead cover band.
I mean, it's also like.
But they knew about LA Takedown.
Yeah, like I talked about that.
Sorry, Jake.
To bury our band.
I also didn't mention Mountain Bruce, but yeah, they wouldn't understand.
No offense taken.
I mean.
Understandable.
LA Takedown is your songwriting vehicle.
Yeah.
It takes precedence.
No, I would say to further complicate matters, Aaron.
Not only are you in a Doors and dead cover band, but you were in a short lived Eagles
cover band with me, which was called Dick Picks Presents Barely Eagles.
Correct.
No, we never actually played a show, but we did practice like 10 times and we were.
Sounded good.
Kind of good.
And I think that'll happen sometime that we actually like play a Barely Eagles show.
I f***ing hope so.
I also got to say like that, the especially with you guys being based in LA, I think you
should take it to the limit and the sky's the limit for what what an Eagles cover band
could do.
I think that could really tap into something.
Barely Eagles has must fly.
I mean, that's going to happen.
Yeah.
You are Glenn Fry.
Aaron, I remember you saying that to me with a sense of affection, but also a slight amount
of derision.
You're like, dude, you are Glenn Fry.
I was also like completely hammered.
Oh, yeah.
But it makes sense because Jake's the Bob Weir of Richard Pictures and Glenn Fry's the
Bob Weir of the Eagles.
I'm the most pedestrian musician in Richard Pictures and Barely Eagles.
I'm good with it.
I'm, you know, I'm like a important pillar of the band.
But yeah, Bob Weir and the Glenn Fry, it's not a sexy role.
Not to some.
Some moms.
I think moms like him.
That's true.
All right, guys, we should get into the top five now.
Aaron, you're going to join us for the top five.
Yeah.
It's time for the top five on iTunes.
Generally with the top five, we compare the top five songs on the Apple Music top 100
global chart right now with the top five Billboard hits of another era.
Aaron, you chose the year that we were going to compare 2020 to and you chose 1985.
Why is that?
That's the year of my birth.
So.
Oh, tight.
See what's going on there.
All right, well, we're about to find out the number five song this week in 1985.
Suddenly by Billy Ocean.
I'm a fake Billy Ocean fan because I really only know Caribbean Queen.
I think you know this song.
I used to think that love was just a fairy tale.
Until that first great voice.
Until that first smile.
But if I had to do it all again.
I wouldn't change a thing because this love is everlasting.
Suddenly.
Life has new meaning to me.
There's beauty up above and things we never take notice of.
This is such an Elton John song.
I like him talking about noticing things you never take notice of.
The refrain is kind of the stranger, Billy Joel.
Yeah.
All right, I get the idea.
That's a strong song.
Vice coined it the best after party song ever.
Okay.
After what kind of party?
They gave LA Takedown worst album cover once.
Wait, which cover?
For the self-titled album.
It's just like our logo with the sunset in it.
That's a cool cover.
That's a good cover.
And I've always thought that the other one,
the kind of airbrush looking picture of the fingers holding the screw.
That's an amazing cover.
Thanks.
Backstory on that.
Yeah, what's the backstory on that?
My dad painted that in 1975.
It's the only painting he's ever done.
Whoa.
Five feet.
Oh, really?
And is it airbrushed or it's like acrylic or whatever?
He says it's acrylic.
I think it's airbrushed though.
Can you airbrush acrylic?
Yes, that's what you airbrush with.
It has such a sharpness.
The number five song in 2020 is Drake "Toosie Slide".
I don't know if we have anything new to say about this.
I mean,
Yeah, this is going deep.
How long has this been?
I think we first talked about it like a month ago.
I don't think we have anything new to say about the song,
but hearing Drake talk about Nike makes me wonder.
We talked last time about how many rappers have ever referenced Jeff Bezos.
Has the rapper referenced the Chunky Dunkys yet?
And if not, who will be the first?
Now that the Chunky Dunkys are officially a phenomenon,
an iconic shoe with a high resale value,
like might there even just be a song straight up called Chunky Dunky?
For sure.
I can't wait.
You got a high resale value.
You're my Chunky Dunky.
Chunky Dunky.
Maybe we should make it.
Just try to do make it like a TikTok song.
Just cash in real hard.
The world needs that.
The world always needs a TikTok song about, you know, whatever's happening.
The number four song.
This is a heavy hitter.
Back in '85, the year of Aaron's birth.
"Simple Minds", "Don't You Forget About Me".
From which soundtrack, fellas?
Breakfast Club.
Yeah.
Wait, play the opening again.
Just like the first three seconds are just so evocative of the song.
It's the first two notes.
You just get the vibe.
It's almost like the "It's been" of, uh, what the f*** is that?
You know what I mean?
It's two words.
"Barenaked Ladies"?
Yeah, it's like those words.
All you need is "It's been" and you know where you're going.
It's cool starting off with a snare hit too.
Yeah.
That's a cool way to start a song.
According to the songwriter, Keith Forsey,
Brian Ferry of Roxy Music was his first choice to record it, but he passed.
Man, this would have been a great mid-80s Brian Ferry song.
Absolutely.
I can picture his voice on it.
Yeah.
I love Brian Ferry, by the way.
Don't you.
So is that the biggest "Simple Minds" song?
Certainly in the U.S.
Weird.
You hear that type of band that in the U.K. probably had like 10 other top 10 hits,
but not in the U.S.
The number four song 2020, "Gunna," "Dollars on My Head" featuring Young Thug
from his new hit album, "Wanna."
He's talking about a fridge.
Yep.
Well, I feel like that's a TC first.
It's a song where somebody actually talks about their fridge.
And he's keeping codeine in it.
I have to assume it's the second fridge.
He says, "Condo like the pharmacy.
I got codeine in my fridge."
He's implying there's so many drugs in the condo.
Yeah, he's got a second fridge for codeine.
Hope he's okay.
It's a lot of prescriptions.
It's not all for him.
Okay.
Who is that?
It's Gunna.
And I love that he called his album "Wanna."
I like rhyming album titles.
I like this song.
There's like a vague, it's like a very mellow but kind of melancholic beat.
I mean, Mike will made it.
We haven't heard him in the top five in a while, but he's like,
definitely one of the best producers of this generation.
There's like a kind of like a sweet sadness to it.
I mean, pretty typical of the era.
A lot of these top five songs from 2020 kind of blur together for me.
But I'm an old guy.
But typical in the sense of being that kind of melancholic.
Yeah, that same production.
Yeah.
Similar kind of beat, just sort of like the same.
Like, I don't know.
I will say I don't know that much about Gunna.
I mean, his delivery.
He's got a very pleasant voice to listen to.
He does?
I think so.
He's got, I like that kind of like laid back delivery.
It's chill.
It's chill.
A lot of the best Atlanta rappers.
I like, I've always liked 21 Savage for the same reason.
It's like this very kind of mellow delivery.
The number three song this week in 1985.
Another soundtrack song.
There's some major soundtracks in the mid 80s.
This one's from Beverly Hills Cop.
And you might know the song Axl F.
Oh, hell yeah.
It refers to Axl Foley, the character played by Eddie Murphy.
Wow.
Artist is Harold Foltermeyer, who made this.
I was just thinking about the song because I was like listening to the song Crazy Frog,
which is like the birth of this weird kind of concept that still exists today,
which is like computer animated videos of annoying characters set to like European techno,
which somehow 15 years later is still like a phenomenon.
And you look at all these videos like Crazy Frog, Gummy Bear one.
They always have like 2 billion views on YouTube.
Now, this is not a joke, but the B side of this is actually really good.
It's called Shootout.
Instrumental?
Yeah, I have this 45 for some reason.
I mean, I like you do.
I like Harold Foltermeyer.
He's rad.
He's cool.
But it's and I understand people are into soundtracks.
It's just hilarious to imagine millions of Americans went out and bought a 45 single
of this piece of instrumental music and just like got home and just like,
yo, throw an Axl F.
It's like, hell yeah.
Aaron, do you know the Harold Foltermeyer story?
Like what was he doing in the 70s?
Like what I have my own speculations that might be based on research or maybe I made
him up and I can't remember.
But I think I feel like he was an underling of Maroder.
Like he came up under Giorgino Maroder.
They definitely collaborated.
Probably German.
Top Gun team.
They co-wrote that together.
Interesting.
OK.
Or they both have writing credits.
It also makes me think, of course, of Jan Hammer, another European synth wizard,
who also had an instrumental hit in the 80s with his theme from Miami Vice.
But Jan Hammer's background was actually playing with like John McLachlan and these
like shredder 70s fusion guys.
So like I wonder if Harold Foltermeyer, like in the 60s or 70s, was also just like ever
like played keys in some sort of like really heady fusion group.
Could easily picture that.
The number three song back in 2020, we've heard this one a lot,
The Weekend Blinding Lights, which interestingly is a bit of an 80s homage.
You know this song, Aaron?
Can't say that I do.
I'm curious once this song kicks off what you think it's kind of referencing or what
inspired it.
Already, Boys of Summer.
OK.
Oh, yeah.
Good call.
Wait, this song is from now?
Yeah, it's The Weekend.
He's getting into his 80s synth sh*t.
Do you remember there was an episode where this song inspired us to go into this whole
riff about...
Oh, the Ultimate Pretty Boy Band?
Yeah, the like guys that are amazing looking, but also write great songs.
Because Aaron, to me...
Duran Duran.
Yeah, exactly.
Duran Duran is up there.
And the other one who I think inspired this song is A-Ha.
Even though this song is much younger, I still felt like...
And the main guys in A-Ha are like very good looking.
And we basically talked about, look, you got your pretty boys.
They already won the genetic lottery.
And we're not just talking about handsome people or good looking people.
We're talking about true pretty boys.
Just drop dead gorgeous model level fellas.
But then they got a set of pipes on them and they can sing.
Okay, fair enough.
They won the genetic lottery twice, but they can also write monster pop hits.
I mean, that's crazy.
I mean, it's unfair.
A-Ha and Duran Duran are the best examples.
Because all the great looking fellas in Duran Duran were also just like amazing musicians.
And that music's so complicated.
And like...
Absolutely.
Duran Duran is like...
They're great songwriters.
Those guys are great songs.
Also, I want to throw Japan in that mix.
The band?
Oh, yeah.
The band Japan.
They're like super pretty.
And those are like crazy songs.
What's the guy's name?
David...
David Sylvian.
Yeah.
Where's he from?
They're British.
Although he did some cool stuff that I used to have like deep mp3s.
I downloaded off Soul Seek of stuff he did with Ritchie Sakamoto.
They had like some cool stuff.
Absolutely.
Back to '85.
This is a pretty monster set of songs.
At number two, we got Tears for Fears' "Everybody Wants to Rule the World."
Hell yeah.
Tears for Fears is so good.
Great song.
Also like an iconic 80s shuffle.
Oh, yeah.
Such a good opening line.
"Welcome to your life."
Yeah, just boom.
"Welcome to my life. Welcome to your life. Welcome."
What was that lyric?
"Turn your back on mother nature."
Human nature?
No.
No, mother nature.
I think it's "Turn your back on mother nature."
Hold on.
What is this song about?
Is this an environmentalist song?
The original chorus of the song was "Everybody wants to go to war."
Whoa.
But one of the members of the group thought that it was lackluster.
Good call.
Yeah, also "Everybody wants to go to war" just doesn't roll off the tongue in quite the same way.
All right, great song.
Let's go back to 2020.
I was actually thinking about this song a little bit when we were talking about Jersey Shore,
because people sometimes forget that Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande teaming up
is actually a pretty big deal for Italian-Americans.
We've talked on this show about Ariana Grande is low-key a Jersey girl,
even though she grew up mostly in Florida.
And Lady Gaga, she's a New Yorker, but she's, you know, tri-state Italian.
They're two tri-state Italians together,
which we haven't seen a pair of tri-state Italians get up in charts like this in a long time.
We don't see that many tri-state Italians up in the top five on the charts, period.
I mean, obviously, you have a fake tri-state Italian, Billy Joel,
who did some damage to the charts in the 70s and 80s, but he's been quiet.
He's been quiet for almost 30 years.
I gotta shout out my friend, Blood Pop, who's one of the producers on almost the entire album.
And this is his work.
So anyway, a new hit from the forthcoming Lady Gaga album, "Chromatica."
Here's her collaboration with Ariana Grande, "Rain On Me."
This album's being kind of seen as Gaga's return to her classic pop roots
after her kind of, you know, her rootsy era.
One funny thing about this song, I've already heard it.
Jake, have you already heard it?
No, I've never heard it.
Because I saw it.
No.
Lady Gaga, she's always an artist that I've always kind of respected.
So I'm interested in what she's up to.
So I saw that, oh, wow, two tri-state Italian women coming together on a single,
like, "Sign Me Up," and it's produced by my boy, Please.
So I watched the video the day it came out, and I really thought about it.
So in the video, there's a lot of water coming down,
understandably, because the song's called "Rain On Me."
But we just heard the chorus, which I looked it up later.
"I'd rather be dry, but at least I'm alive.
Rain on me."
And I understood, okay, this is, I'm sure there's more to it,
but at the very least, this is about embracing adversity and saying,
"You know what?
There's a version of life that could be easier.
I might even prefer to be dry.
But going through this heaviness of getting rained on actually reminds me I'm alive."
It's like a celebratory sentiment in a way.
It's not sugar-coated, and it's about coming through some s***.
So that all makes sense.
But I swear, I watched the entire video, and I really thought every time I heard the chorus
that she was saying, "I'd rather be drunk, but at least I'm alive."
And I was like, "Oh, s***.
This is like the giving up booze song."
And then I was listening to this whole song, and I was going,
"I'd rather be drunk, but at least I'm alive."
And I was like, "That's such an amazingly bold chorus."
And I was like, "I know I'm so impressed by people who do 12-step stuff,
because that's something that requires so much thought and examination and daily work and stuff."
So I was like, "Whoa, this is just straight up a big sober pop song."
And also what I was impressed by was that she wasn't sugar-coating it,
and she wasn't saying, "Oh, yeah."
Because sometimes you talk to different people who are sober, and there's one school...
Sometimes you hear from people like, "Oh, man, that was terrible.
Those are the bad old days.
I don't miss it at all.
You know what I'm into?
Exercise or this or that."
And then there's another type of person you talk to.
It's the same thing could be about cigarettes or drugs or anything.
And they say, "I haven't drank in 20 years."
And be like, "Oh, so what's that like?"
"I think about drinking every single day."
You know, like if you've ever met somebody like that.
And I'm sure everybody's different, but I'm very impressed by people like that,
because they're keeping it real.
They're like, "It's not easy."
So anyway, I thought that was that kind of song where she's like,
"I'd rather be drunk, but at least I'm alive."
Wait, what is the actual lyric?
Can you back it up and play the chorus again?
"I'd rather be dry."
Oh, oh, "rain," I see.
I'd prefer if it wasn't raining on me, but, you know, let's hear that chorus.
"I'd rather be drunk, but at least I'm alive."
No, it does sound like drunk.
Yeah.
"Rain on me, rain, rain."
"I'd rather be drunk, but at least I'm alive."
Yeah, wait.
Maybe she is saying drunk.
Maybe I'm right.
I looked it up.
Seinfeld, let me get a number crunch.
What are you seeing on the lyrics websites?
It is, "I'd rather be dry."
"Not drunk."
Maybe they just don't want people to know what the song's really about.
Maybe it's like a nod to all the other sober people struggling out there,
and she's like, "That's just for us."
It's a little bit Starbucks lovers.
Like, you can't unhear it once you hear it that way.
What's Starbucks lovers?
Is that Taylor Swift?
Taylor Swift, "Blank Space."
Do you know that song?
No.
"And I go to the, da-da."
Oh, I do know that song.
"Da-da-da, Starbucks."
How does it go?
I gotta do it backwards.
"'Cause I got a blank space, baby.
Nah, not your name."
There's a funny article that came out recently, like five days ago,
that says Lady Gaga flirted with the idea of going sober while making this album.
Oh.
Flirted.
This is a beautiful song.
Beautiful.
Here it comes, here it comes.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure.
There's no question.
Except when you work backwards, it's not a complete sentence.
It sounds like you're saying, "Got a long list, Starbucks lovers."
I guess that could be like a GBV lyric.
"I've got a long list, Starbucks lovers."
Really just beautiful song.
Okay, the number one song this week in '85.
Okay, '85 is killing it.
Very strong.
Is "Wham!"
I've waxed poetic about George Michael before.
Because, by the way, George Michael, he wasn't in a band, but he's the ultimate pretty boy.
Yes.
Drop Dead Gorgeous Man wrote his own songs for his solo stuff and "Wham!"
and produced them by himself.
His first solo album, the fact that he just made it himself, and he's that handsome,
coming in at number one on the Time Crisis list of '80s pretty boys.
Yeah, he's the ultimate triple threat.
This song is good.
Yes, so good.
I love this song.
I can also imagine that for a lot of people, "Wham!" was seen as very lightweight in the
beginning, especially because I think the big single before this was, "Wake me up before
you go go."
Kind of corny.
I could just totally picture somebody hearing this song and being like, "Wait, who is this?"
And be like, "This is Wham?"
And just kind of starting to realize with this song that there's something under the hood.
Just like, "Wait, somebody's really smart in this organization."
Just such a naturally chill, bouncy dude.
Man, what a banger.
Wait, oh, this song was mentioned in a landmark 1998 sampling copyright decision where they
concluded that MC Hammer had sampled music by another group and that group had sampled
this song but not disclosed it.
Oh, so MC Hammer got kind of screwed there.
Also, one thing I'll say is anybody who's a big music nerd or spent a lot of time on
the internet in the past five to ten years is probably aware of the renewed Western interest
in the late '70s or really '80s genre of Japanese music called city pop.
Like, Light in the Attic puts out these great compilations and there's so much cool stuff.
Sometimes I'll get on a YouTube rabbit hole that's a lot of really incredible music.
It's funny.
I don't know if it's because I've listened to too much city pop and '80s Japanese music
and Vaporwave that samples that stuff, but I can't help but feel like everything she
wants by Wham sounds Japanese to me now.
Realistically, I'm probably reacting to the fact that there's probably some Japanese music
made by people who were into this song and the stuff it was referencing.
But do you guys feel me at all that it kind of sounds Japanese?
Yeah.
I hear it's got a little bit of that city pop vibe.
Aaron, who is the older Japanese gentleman that guest vocaled on your album?
On the new Takedown album, Yukihiro Takahashi sings a song.
He was the drummer and singer in Yellow Magic Orchestra.
So with Ritchie Sakamoto.
And Hiromi Hosono.
Yeah.
Yeah, real super.
You know what's funny?
I was just kind of baked the other night and I wanted to watch some live music on YouTube
and I was clicking around and I ended up throwing on Yellow Magic Orchestra live at the Greek
theater.
And one question that I couldn't figure out was, were they opening for somebody?
Or did they?
Because it says it was like night two.
Did Yellow Magic Orchestra pack out the Greek theater in the '80s for two nights?
I feel like they were opening for like a kind of punkish band.
I can't remember what it was, but I remember being surprised by the bill.
Maybe like a radio station put it together or something.
It was 1979.
They're playing the Greek theater with the Tubes.
I don't know much about the Tubes.
Are they like an LA punk band?
That's a bit of a blind spot for me.
I'll check them out though.
Interesting bill.
The number one song right now, 2020.
Is DaBaby featuring Roddy Ricch.
I think we did hear the song last time.
It's Rockstar.
We were a little bit disappointed that we finally get a rock song at number one and
it's got more of like an acoustic Spanish guitar vibe.
Right.
But DaBaby's really good.
The Tubes were from San Francisco.
Okay.
Oh dude, you know who was in the Tubes?
Who?
Vince Wellnick.
Right.
Grateful Dead connection.
Always.
I like how they're talking about a Lamborghini.
Very 80s.
Lamborghinis.
Have you ever been in a Lamborghini?
I like you have to think about it.
I have a vague memory of once getting a ride in a sports car,
like a really fancy sports car.
And my first thought being like, this is insane how low to the ground it is.
This is not luxurious.
It's not cool.
Yeah.
This is uncomfortable to enter.
I don't feel special riding in this car.
I feel like a loser.
So I remember whatever car that was could have been a Lamborghini.
I was like, this is lame.
Jake, what's the most baller car that you've ever driven?
Maybe like a nice Tesla or something.
But I know what you mean.
I have been in some sports cars that are like super low to the ground and you're just sort of
like this most bottom out on like driveways and like speed bumps like constantly.
Yeah.
It just makes me think of like Wolf of Wall Street, just like this kind of like,
just like a dude riding this like low to the ground car that just gets f**ked up.
I'm not trying to be too much of a hater because like, if people are taking the design angle
or like, I know that a lot of people are into those kind of cars are like really,
they're actually care about like the technical stuff.
And like, I get it.
Like, I mean, I don't get it, but I can imagine what it's like to be like,
like if you said this thing about being low to the ground, some people might be like,
yeah, it's not the most comfortable thing in the world to get into.
That's because this is a sports car, my friend.
You have a totally different value system.
What I'm interested in is the center of gravity and the, you know,
V8, whatever, all this s**t that I know nothing about.
I know like people who are into like vintage cars.
So like I know people who are like always talking about Porsche 911s.
From like the 70s or?
Like the 90s.
Yeah.
Some, I know some people who are really into the 60s and 70s ones.
I have a friend who has like a vintage Porsche.
And one time we were driving around and we were getting into the car in front of a coffee shop
or something.
And a guy pulled up next to us and was like, oh, okay.
Like 72.
Oh, actually 71.
Oh, you know, this whole conversation.
And then my friend said to me, like, maybe it was the first time we'd gone out together
in that car.
And he said, you'll see this car is a total dude magnet.
And then as we drove around the rest of the day, there was so many times that dudes would
like pull up at stoplights and be like, okay, like thumbs up.
Like a total dude magnet.
But anyway, I feel like I'm so ignorant about car stuff.
There's like once or twice where I felt like I had to make stereotypically masculine conversation
with somebody.
There's literally one time where I actually felt like my ability to identify a Porsche
911.
It wasn't like a tense situation, but just like, you know, I always feel like at a disadvantage,
like I can't talk sports that well or stuff.
And like sometimes you're just like with a dude who just like doesn't care about the
Grateful Dead or Chunky Dunkeys or anything like that.
He's into cars and sports, you know, sports.
Maybe I could be like, hey, you see the last dance?
But there's one time I'm not going to go into details, but it was just like where I just
had this interaction where I was like, is that a 911?
Which probably is already kind of basic.
No, no, I didn't say that because saying it's a 911 is too stupid.
That literally like going up to a guy with a guitar and be like, is that a fender?
Just like says fender.
And I was like, yeah, you know, I didn't say it was a 911, but I said, what year is that?
And because I knew that my friend had one from a certain year, I'd heard some conversation
about when the design changed.
I was like, is that late 80s?
And he was like 89.
And I was like, yeah, so I thought, I don't know.
And I just felt like, all right.
But like then you're on thin ice because you've started the conversation, but you know nothing
more.
Right.
You're totally tapped out.
He's ready to start talking with you about it.
Yeah, it's an 89.
And you're like, I'm thinking I literally don't even know what V8 means.
Do you guys know what V8 means?
It's eight cylinders.
Tomato juice.
Eight cylinders pumping in the engine.
The eight cylinder engine, like a Honda Civic is like a four cylinder.
Wait, but what does the V stand for?
A valve, I guess, probably.
Could you identify a Porsche 911 from 50 yards?
No, I don't know anything about like maker models.
But for some reason, I do know about the basics of the number of pistons in an engine.
It was like crazy, like powerful pickup trucks that are like, you know, like V12 or something.
Oh, they really, you know, like an F350.
Don't quote me on this.
I could be wrong on this, but like a big, like Ford F350.
I'm going to guess that's like a V, I don't know, V10 or I don't think there's a V10,
like a V12.
Guys, the V doesn't stand for anything, by the way.
The V, the V refers to the formation of the engine, the shape of the engine looks like a V.
Seinfeld, could you just do a quick number crunch on the number of pistons on the Ford F350?
Sure.
Wait, so Seinfeld, are you a car guy?
Did you know that?
I pulled it up.
Just a number.
Yeah, no, I did a number crunch.
Check this out.
I'm not a car guy, but I know this tidbit that'll help you guys out in male situations.
Yeah.
There's an alternative to a V and it's called a slant.
So there's like a slant six.
It's just slanted one way instead of being shaped like a V.
And so you don't call it a V6 or whatever.
And I didn't look that up.
I only know that because I had to buy a van at one point.
So you're kind of, you're low-key a car guy, you're a van guy.
I love the idea of trying to, of getting really into something specific about cars.
And then next time you want to talk with a guy who's just like a general car enthusiast
who wants to talk about the classics, but being like, "Hey, ask me anything about the
1989 Mercury Sable."
And the guy's like, "I don't care about that."
Be like, "No, I'm a car guy too, but I know everything about it."
And then just like giving him useless facts.
It'd be kind of like trying to have like guy talk about sports to like somebody just like,
you know, classic football, basketball, baseball.
And then, I don't know, like obsessively talking about like Aussie rules football.
That's the type of thing.
It's like the American dude who's just like really into international sports.
Oh, yeah.
I love that guy.
Soccer doesn't count because soccer is kind of like so broadly popular now.
Rugby.
Just to be like, yeah, be like, "I follow."
You know, it's very rare.
It basically doesn't exist.
To be an American guy and your family is American.
Like you're multi-generational American.
Your family is not from the UK or Australia or India or Pakistan or something.
And to just be obsessed with cricket.
Be like, "How'd you get in?
Your parents?
Watch it?"
Oh, God, no.
Be like, you know, I was 11 years old.
I was flipping through channels out of my grandma's house.
I caught a little bit of Hour 4 of England versus South Africa, whatever, '97.
And I was hooked.
Because people always used to joke soccer.
Oh, like Americans don't like soccer.
I know so many dudes who have like a team.
You know, it's not weird at all.
American people are interested in soccer and be like, "Oh, yeah.
Oh, look, how's Tottenham doing?
How's whatever."
But I will say that I've never met the cricket equivalent.
Maybe it's got to be us.
Cricket talk.
Those are long games.
I read a book about cricket by C.L.R. James.
That's cool.
It's about the West Indian team that kind of swept the world.
Because the West Indian, they had people from all the West Indian countries together.
And there was a team, I think, in the '60s that just like kicked everybody's asses and
invented a new style called fast bowling.
And it was an interesting story because it's about race and imperialism and culture and
stuff as well.
Because obviously, you can imagine that was a big deal for the West Indian team to come
back and beat England.
The place where the sport was invented.
It's a very interesting book.
And he's a famous writer who writes about or he wrote about stuff outside of cricket.
Can I just wrap up the car talk a little bit?
I mean, F-350 is a V8 engine.
And I'm looking at the V12 engine.
And I think that's like when you get above eight cylinders, I think you start to get
into like high powered sports cars like we were talking about earlier, like Porsches
and stuff.
I just did my own number crunch and I searched V32 engine.
Jesus.
It looks kind of almost like a gag or something.
Right.
I love to think about people that know anything about cars listening to this idiotic part.
Just like just being like, oh, my God.
Also, the top five ended like 10 minutes ago.
They're just right now.
They're just screaming at their phone.
Yeah, this episode was a real treat because, you know, after sometimes we end right after
the top five, but this time we got an extra special 10 minutes for all our car enthusiasts.
So you're welcome, everybody.
Well, Aaron, thanks so much for coming on the show.
Thanks for having me.
Thank you to our other guest Jonah Hill, who hopefully will be coming on real soon again.
And Brendan Dunn, who was very informative about Chunky Dunkys and the SB Dunks.
We'll see you next time.
Time Crisis with Ezra Koenig.
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